PJO on Crack
by I Am Miranda Of The Tempest
Summary: This story is for people who like to laugh. A comedy involving our favorite charcters and a gay, purple armadillo with a funny english accent who wears a top hat named Chad.
1. Monster makes a monster

**Ok, this chapter is not as funny as the others. Just keep reading! Its gets better! I promise!**

**Love,love,love,**

** Psirena (Miranda)**

"I'm so BORED!" Percy groaned.

"Me too…." Grover sighed. They were sitting outside of the Poseidon cabin bored to tears, camp activities had been cancelled due to the heat and no one had any idea how to entertain themselves.

"I've got an idea!" Grover exclaimed excitedly.

"Ok, let's hear it." Percy said obviously intrigued. Grover reached into the bag beside him smiling evilly and withdrew a Monster Energy Drink.

"And what IS that exactly?" Percy asked.

"You don't know?" Grover said surprised.

"Nope. I most certainly have no idea."

"Good…" Grover said rubbing his hands together suspiciously. "Here, just drink it."

"What is it?"

"Just drink it!"

"What is it?!"

"Just drink it!!!"

"Fine!" Percy yelled exasperated. He gulped the entire can within moments. "EW!!! WHAT WAS THAT?!"

"An energy drink! Now I have added Guarana and a sky rocketing amount of sugar to your ADHD! This is our entertainment!"

"I really don't see how this will be fun, I mean-"(Now to get an idea of how the sugar affected the H is his ADHD, click here: .com/watch?v=RowjCyK3ZLE )

Percy gets up and runs around the camp twice. Annabeth notices all the commotion and comes running over.

"WHAT'S GOING ON?! WHAT HAPPENED TO PERCY?!" she yelled.

Grover shrugged, "I don't know."

Annabeth runs over and catches Percy making his 3rd lap around the camp by the shoulders and tries to hold him still.

"Percy? What happened? What's wrong?"

"phjbasfeyiufgrakjsbfkjdouifghkjbvipadgsf!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he yells.

"Great…." She sighs as she drags him to the Pegasus stables.

The Pegasai notice Annabeth pushing a large plastic box through the stable doors. A camper inside the stables walks up to her and asks her where she got such a large plastic box.

"Well I- Actually I have no idea… Anyway! Listen up Pegasai! I need your help! I know you've got a mental connection with Percy so I need you to read his mind and lead me to whoever did this to him! Ok?!"

The Pegasai nod in agreement. Meanwhile, Percy is bouncing off the sides of the box like a crazed squirrel.

"Okay then." Annabeth yells. She opens up the door to the box and Percy shoots out like a rocket. Annabeth holds him still and looks to the Pegasai for an answer. They start banging their heads against the stable's wall furiously as if to say 'MAKE IT STOP!!!' Annabeth looked up at the sky. "RICK!!! RICK!!!" No reply….. "HEY!!! YOU UP THERE!!!"

"Yes?" boomed a female voice from the clouds above in response.

"You're not Rick!"

"No I'm not. I am Psirena!" squealed the voice.

"Well whoever you are!-"

"Psirena."

"Right, Psirena…. Are you the one who's doing this?"

"Well, I control it, ya."

"WHY YOU- !$%^&*()!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"I wouldn't talk to me like that! I can make something similar happen you you! So if I were you I would shut up!"

"Shutting!" Annabeth watched the still frantic Pegasai and loosened her hold on Percy for just a moment and he shoots off down the hill toward the dining area. She curses herself for letting her guard down even for a moment and turns back to the poor Pegasai. They mournfully lead Annabeth toward the cabins right toward Grover and the empty Monster can.

"No! Wait Annabeth! I can explain!" he shouts.

"NO NEED!" Annabeth grabs Grover by the collar and Pitches him right into the Ares cabin. Shouting and yelling can be heard from all around the camp. Satisfied, Annabeth finds the unconscious Percy on top of a picnic table. She shakes him awake and he opens his eyes drearily, "What happened?" he groaned, "Ow, my head…. Hey, where's my shirt?"


	2. Sing off! Percabeth or Prachel?

"YOU KNOW WHAT PSIRENA?! I DON'T LIKE YOU!!!YOU ARE A !#$%^&*)(&$##$!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Annabeth screamed the sky.

"I wouldn't have said that if I were you!"

"Oh ya?! What are you going to do?!"

Annabeth suddenly found herself in an auditorium with a bunch of Percabeth fangirls surrounding her from every side. "Where am I?!" Up on stage the curtains pulled back to show Percy and Luke under a single spotlight. "Barbie Girl" suddenly starts playing out of nowhere and Luke is wearing a dress. Luke sings all of Aqua's parts and Percy sings all of Rene's.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Annabeth screams, her eye twitches and the music ends. "Now where am I?!" She looked around and the auditorium and noticed that the auditorium has changed into the "Thriller" music video.

"NO!!!!!!! ANYTHING BUT MICHAEL JACKSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

An evil laugh echoed around her. Luke was dancing Michael's part and the rest of the camp served as the back up dancers. The song ended and the scene transforms into Percy's school. "Now where- you know what? I'm not going to question it anymore." The class was filled with students doing a normal class lesson and Rachel is seated next to Percy, when all of a sudden the teacher whiped out a boom box and hit play. "You Belong With Me" by Taylor Swift started playing and Rachel jumped up on top of her desk and danced like it's her own concert.

She opens her mouth and began singing in a perfect voice equivalent to that of Taylor Swift herself:

You're on IM  
With Annabeth  
She's upset  
She's going off about  
Something that you said  
She doesn't get your humor  
Like I do

I'm in my room  
It's a typical Tuesday night  
I'm listening to the kind of music  
She doesn't like  
She'll never know your story  
Like I do

But she wears armor  
I wear paint chips  
She's from Athena's cabin  
And I'm just a mortal  
Dreaming about the day  
When you wake up and find  
That what you're looking for  
Has been here the whole time

If you could see  
That I'm the one  
Who understands you  
Been here all along  
So why can't you  
See you belong with me  
You belong with me.

Walking the streets  
With you and your half blood Tee  
I can't help thinking  
This is how it ought to be  
Laughing on a park bench  
Thinking to myself  
Hey, isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile  
That could light up this whole town  
I haven't seen it in awhile  
Since she brought you down  
You say you're fine  
I know you better than that  
Hey whatcha doing  
With a demigod like that?

She wears camp shirts  
I wear T-shirts  
She's from Athena's cabin  
I'm just a mortal  
Dreaming about the day  
When you wake up and find  
That what you're looking for  
Has been here the whole time

If you could see  
That I'm the one  
Who understands you  
Been here all along  
So why can't you  
See you belong with me  
Standing by and  
Waiting at the border  
All this time  
How could you not know  
Percy  
You belong with me  
You belong with me.

Oh, I remember  
You running to my house  
In the middle of the night  
I'm the one who makes you laugh  
When you know you're about to cry  
And I know your favorite songs  
And you tell me about your dreams  
Think I know where you belong  
Think I know it's with me

Can't you see  
That I'm the one  
Who understands  
Been here all along  
So why can't you see?  
You belong with me.

Have you ever thought  
Just maybe  
You belong with me?

She jumped off her desk and kissed Percy on the cheek. Apparently there was a Prachel fangirl among the rest because someone squealed and then disappeared beneath the mob of angry Percabeth fangirls.

"Now choose! Rachel or Annabeth?!" the teacher yelled.

"Wait!" Annabeth yelled. "Don't I get a turn?!"

"Sure….." the teacher sneered.

A stage appeared out of nowhere and Annabeth found herself suddenly standing on it front and center. She lifted the microphone that somehow magically appeared in her hand and began to sing to "Hey Stephan" another Taylor Swift song:

Hey Percy, I know looks can be deceiving but I know I saw a light in you  
As we walked we were talking and I didn't say half the things I wanted to  
Of all the girls tossing rocks at your window  
I'll be the one waiting there even when it's cold  
Hey Percy, boy you might have me believing I don't always have to be alone.

Cause I can't help it if you look like a god  
Can't help I if I want you on my quest so  
Come feel this magic I've been feeling since I met you  
Can't help it if there's no one else  
I can't help myself

Hey Percy, I've been holding back this feeling  
So I've got some things to say to you  
I seen it all so I thought but I never seen anyone shine the way you do  
They you walk, the way you walk, the way you say my name  
It's beautiful, wonderful, don't you ever change  
Hey Percy, why are people always leaving?  
I think you and I should stay the same

Cause I can't help it if you look like a god  
Can't help I if I want you on my quest so  
Come feel this magic I've been feeling since I met you  
Can't help it if there's no one else  
I can't help myself

They're dimming the street lights  
You're perfect for me why aren't you here tonight?  
I'm waiting alone now so come on and come out and pull me near  
Shine, shine, shine

Hey Percy I could give you fifty reasons why I should be the one you choose  
That other girls, well she's beautiful but would she fight Kronos with you?

Cause I can't help it if you look like a god  
Can't help I if I want you on my quest so  
Come feel this magic I've been feeling since I met you  
Can't help it if there's no one else  
I can't help myself

Cause I can't help it if you look like a god  
Can't help I if I want you on my quest so  
Come feel this magic I've been feeling since I met you  
Can't help it if there's no one else  
I can't help myself  
Myself, can't help myself  
I can't help myself.

Annabeth put the microphone down and the class went wild. Annabeth looked up at the ceiling and said,"Psirena? Why are you so messed up?"

"It's a gift darling!" said Psirena.

"Are we done now?"

"Yes want to go back?"

"Ya. OH! Wait! I just have one more thing to do!" Annabeth walked up to Rachel and punched her in the face.

"DAMN!!!" the class said in unison, and Annabeth found herself back at camp.

"WAIT! PERCY DIDN'T CHOOSE!!"

DUN DUN DUNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	3. We're Going On An Author Hunt!

**Okay everyone, I've recieved alot of questions asking why the characters flash around to different places without describing how they got there. The answer is that I control this "world" if you read it you'll notice that they interact with me alot . The characters are suposed to be OOC just a tad and I knw that Percy could never get high off of a Monster but that's the joke. Characters will pop out of no where the disappear because I CONTROL THIS LITTLE WORLD! They will be singing one minute and then be gone because I AM CONTROLING IT! You'll also notice that they get confused as to why its happening because they too have n o idea how they got where they are. I personally am not on crack, just humerous. I am a big Taylor Swift fan so you'll se some references to her. Some people have asked what the point to this story is.... THERE IS NO POINT!!! It's just somthing to make you laugh! So until next chapter, may the gods be with you my fellow young half-bloods. *chinese gong sound***

"I hate our author!" Annabeth yelled, "Rick is who-knows-where and this wierd Psirena person has taken over!"

"Calm down Annabeth...." Percy sighed, "We can't do anything..... She controls this whole world! We can't do anything. She could just write us to some other place and we'd be stuck there forever until she felt like putting us back."

"AHHHHH!!!!!!" Annabeth yelled. They were sitting outside the dining pavilion but were somehow, randomly, on the beach in California.

"See?"

"Sorry!" Anabeth yelled at the sky. They were suddenly back at the dining pavillion. Grover came running up to them and proudly anounced, "I know where Psirena lives! I know how to get there too!"

"And we should trust you, why? You were the one who gave Percy that Monster so how do we know this isn't another trick?" Annabeth scowled.

"Because I really don't want to get thrown into the Ares cabin again. They tried to set me on fire!" he cringed, "Almost succeded too...."

"Then you'd better be telling the truth!" Percy said.

"Oh I am! Ok, so all we need to do is-" They were suddenly infront of an elevator. Above the elevator was a sign that read, 'Psirena's house, 4th floor.'

"Nevermind..." Grover sighed as the elevator doors opened. They stepped inside but they weren't alone. In the corner was a strange purple armadillo wearing a top hat. It wasstanding in the corner facing the wall, it didn't get off. On its back was a 'Hello my name is' tag. Aparently his name was Chad. Below his name in small print it said, 'Yes, I'm gay!' (I AM NOT IMPLYING THAT GAY PEOPLE ARE WIERD!!!) As Percy pressed the button for the 4th floor, two things happened simultaniously.

1) The gay armadillo named Chad made an explosion noise out of no where. And...

2) Percy jumped when the button shocked him, smiling, he went back for more.

"Percy!" Annabeth scolded. Percy dropped his hand, "Sorry..."

The elevator took longer than it should have. It rose up and up and up. Ocasionally, Chad would meow. The elevator stopped so quickly that the group was thrown to the ground. Chad remained standing, completely unfazed. Instead of dinging the elevator played 'Girlfriend' by Avril Lavigne. After peeling themselves off the ground they exited the elevator and looked back watching Chad the gay purple meowing armadillo finally turn around and press the button to go down. "Good Day" he said politely tipping his top hat and winking at Percy. Percy shuddered. As the doors closed Chad asummed the fetal position and screamed, "ITS THOSE VOICES AGAIN!!!" He whacked his fore head repeatedly with his wierd claw hand things, "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" Annabeth twitched and the doors finally shut.

"He was a delightful armadillo!" Grover fawned. Percy and Annabeth just stared at him.

"What?" he asked inocently. Annabeth shook her head and lead them through the massive hall they were now in. They came to an office type-of-room. Inside was a large office desk and chair which was facing the opposite direction.

"I've been expecting you." Psirena smiled, spinning her chair around to look at them.

"I'm sure." Annabeth said, clearly annoyed. That's when they all noticed that Psirena had a large, beautiful green mermaid tail.

"Whoa." They all said in unison, all in awe of it. She wore a shell bra with pearl straps and had pearls woven into her long, flowing brown hair.

"Look," Annabeth said regaining composure, "We wanted to ask if you could maybe, just maybe try making the stories a little tiny bit more normal."

"We?" Percy asked, apalled. Annabeth elbowed him in the ribs.

"Hmmmm....... Maybe...... But what do I get out of this?" Psirena asked.

"Umm...... What do you want?" Annabeth asked confused.

"OH! I KNOW! PUT NICO IN HIS OWN PERSONAL TORTURE CHAMBER!" Psirena giggled. She swished her tail in the air.

"OK....... How do we find him?" Annabeth asked. Psirena smiled and started typing madly on the lap top on the desk. Nico popped into existance next to Percy and looked around bewildered.

"This isn't the emo convention!" Nico complained.

"But first, a little challenge...." Psireana anounced, she swished her tail one last time and fluttered her fingers waving god-bye to Percy alone. She pressed a key on her keyboard and a boat apperared beneath them and then the ocean around it. Annabeth stayed calm but turned her atantion to Percy.

"So, who won the singing contest?" Annabeth asked suspiciously.

Percy started sweating nervously, "Well you were both awsome singers....."

Annabeth grabbed him by the neck and thrust his head into the ocean.

"I ASKED WHO WON!!! TELL ME WHO WON!!!" She yelled. She pulled his head out.

"Ummm...... Taylor Swift! I pick Taylor Swift!" He yelled, stupid Percy...... Annabeth dunked his head in again.

"You could at least get wet! Who won?!"

"YOU! YOU! YOU!" He yelled.

Nico just backed cautiously to the edge of the bout. Grover just stared at Nico like the dead man he was.

"What?" Nico asked self conciously.

"Your gonna have to take one for the team man...."


	4. If Your Happy and You Know It

After Annabeth tried unsuccessfuly to drown Percy.... twice....... They were magically transported back to camp. Upon arriving they ezplained everything to Chiron while Nico stood obliviously out of earshot.

"We need to borrow your room." Percy told Chiron.

"Anything to stop this madness." Chiron agreed.

"Nico!!!" Grover called. Nico walked over cautiously. (SP) Once he was with in arms reach Percy and Annabeth grabbed him and dragged him toward the big house.

"NO! WAIT! WHERE ARE WE GOING?!" Nico shouted as his heels left tracks in the dirt. Grover followed explaining.

"WHAT?! NO WAY MAN! WHAT ARE YOU EVEN GOING TO DO?! WHAT IF I GAVE YOU SOME DIRT ON SOMEONE PERCY?!" Nico shouted trying to bribe his way out.

"Dirt on who?" Percy asked stopping in his tracks.

"You can't be serious." Annabeth protested.

"Shush Wise Girl! On who, Nico?"

"Thalia." Nico whispered sadistically, fitting for a son of Hades....

"Sweet." Percy beamed, "Well let's see!"

"You promise you won't throw me in a torture room if I do?"

"I promise I won't"

"Ok...." Nico fished a golden drachma out of his pocket and told Percy to bend some water from a water bottle into a mist.

"Oh godess! Accept my offering!" Nico threw the coin into the mist Percy had created. "Thalia, Daughter of Zeus."

The mist shimmered and Nico checked his watch nervously. "It's about the right time." he murmured.

Thalia apeared in the mist. Everything aroud her was black, including her clothes. She raised a lightning bolt shaped blade (Ha! Irony!) to her arm and made a shallow gash. Blood oozed from it and she grabbed the cut in pain.

"Ow! It hurts so good!" she whispered. Percy, Annabeth, and Grover all stared at the image in disbelief.

"Thalia?" Percy said. Thalia looked up in surprised.

"What the?!" Thalia exclaimed, "I want to be there!" She yelled at the ceiling. The IM disapeared and Thalia, full, real, and..... well..... pissed...... was standing in front of them. Nico tried to run but Thalia caught him by his neck, holding him above the ground so that he couldn't get away.

"You were stalking me AGAIN?!" Thalia shreiked.

"This has happened before?!" Percy and Annabeth exclaimed in unison.

"Yes!" Thalia screamed, her arm was bleeding still, "he is a filthy little stalker!"

"Your a stalker too!" Nico shouted, "You've been stalking Percy ever since he got high off Monster!" Thalia looked embaressed.

"Yes I have you little brat! But I know what they wanted to do to you and now I'm going to carry it through!" Thalia admited. Percy twitched, "She's my cousin! That's just wierd...... She's a closer cousin than Nico too....." Percy shuddered. Thalia dragged Nico to the Big House while shocking him so hard Nico looked like he was convulsing. Thalia marched inside and threw Nico into Chiron's room magically producing a record from behind her back adn slapping it onto the record player. She set it up and got it ready to play and ran out of the room and locked the door, laughing meniacly. Annabeth and Percy watched in horror as "If Your Happy and You Know It." started playing. Nico screamed and clawed at the door furiously.

"Clap underworld boy! Clap!" Thalia yelled. Nico stopped clawing at the door.

"I can't hear you clapping!" Two weak claps were heard. The song ended and changed into the "My Little Ponies" theme song. A blood curdling, chills-up-and-down-your-spine scream sounded from behind the door. It was so loud and awful that it's reverbirations are still being heard to this day. Yes, that is what that ringing sound in your ears is. Not another peep was heard from the room. The song ended and Thalia catiously opened the door. Nico had hit himself over the head with one of Chiron's snow globes, knocking himself unconcious. Thalia stamped her foot in defeat.

************************************************************************************************************************************************************************

When Nico woke up he noticed he was in the same room but his butt stung. He took a look..... and there, on his ass was a large rainbow tatoo. It had clouds and sparkles around it too. Nico screamed and ran out to the meadow outside of the Big House. He furiously dug at the ground and buried himself. The whole camp had gathered to watch. Percy's eyes widened, "Wait then that leaves you," he said pointing at Thalia, "and me....." Percy started digging a grave of his own. He turned and saluted Thalia saying, "The prophecy is all yours Cuz!" He got ready to jump into the pit but Annabeth caught his shirt collar and pulled him away saying, "Oh no you don't prophecy boy!" Percy groaned. Thalia turned to look at Annabeth,

"So when do you think we should tell Nico the tatoo is fake?"

Annabeth shrugged.


	5. No Consideration For Pudding

**Ok, I know I haven't updated in a while so don't kill me! This one actually happened! Just imagine me as Percy and Annabeth as my BFF Emma. This really did happen but during a text conversation.**

Annabeth was walking to the archery range when Percy ran up and held out the shiny new cell phone his mom had given him.

"I licked my phone!" Percy anounced to Annabeth. Percy laughed evily.

"What the-?"

"Well I was eating some chocolate pudding and some pudding got on the screen of my phone and... well..... I REALLY LOVE PUDDING! I heart you Pudding!" Percy looked at the pudding cup in his other hand adoringly and continued in a small voice,"_I heart you too, Percy! _Now pudding and I shall rule the world together!!! Mwahahahahaha!!!" he was talking to himself, or rather, the pudding now. Annabeth backed up nervously. "We shall now rule the world!!! We shall start with the JELL-O kingdom!! We will dominate them!!!" Percy turned back to look at his pudding cup,"_But JELL-O is my girlfriend!!!"_ he said in that tiny voice. "All is fair in love and war!!! _How?! _I-! I don't know......"

"Percy? Do I need to get the nice men in white coats?" Annabeth asked hesitantly.

"No!" Percy cried, "The men in white coats are mean! They don't get a jacket for my pudding too! It's cold outside! Have they no consideration for my pudding?! They plan to put me in that soft yellow room but I won't let them! I demand my room to be painted BLUE!!!"

Annabeth noticed for the first time that Percy was coated in a thick layer of chocolate pudding from head to toe.

"How much Pudding have you had today? Alot?" she inquired.

Percy stopped talking to himself and turned to look at her, "Define, alot....."

Annabeth put 2 fingers in her mouth and whistled sharply. Two men in white coats apeared and coaxed Percy into a white straight jacket.

"Wait!" Percy yelled. "What about my pudding?!" One of the men reached into his pocket and pulled out a pudding cup sized jacket and put it on the pudding.

"Whoa, does this happen alot in your line of work?" Annabeth asked him.

The man shook his head and jerked his chin toward Percy who was demanding his yellow room be blue this time, and said,"Nope, just alot with THIS kid in particular. Ussually its the pudding cup but sometimes its a water bottle..... He likes to insist he's the son of Poseidon and that he can bend the water before he just crushes the whole bottle with his hands to make it explode....... Needless to say, he's not aloud to eat sugar......." Then they carried Percy away to his new squishy blue room and carried his coated pudding in tote. Percy's last remark before they closed the doors of his blue room?

"If Jimmy cracked corn and nobody cared, why'd they write a song about it?"

**_IMPORTANT!!! MUST READ ENTIRE AUTHOR"S NOTE!!! IMPORTANT!!!_**

**Ok, I know it was short but I think it's one of the best chapters so far! This is what happens when you lock me in a cramped room for long periods of time, I come out spouting this crap! So I'm sorry I threatened to stop the story! I got alot of angry emails asking me why I would even dream of such a thing and then they threatened to find me if I didn't continue so I made the wise decision to continue it..... By the way, updates might be few and far between for a little while because my synchronized swimming team made it all the way to REGIONALS!!! YAY!!! So if we make it past regionals e'll be flying to Florida for Nationals and I'll have tons of new funny stuff to add to this becasue synchro and school is where all of my ideas come from. In the next chapter I will be giving Annabeth some contacts and anyone who knows what I mean will be saying at this very instant, "OH CRAP!!! I CAN"T BELIEVE SHE"S GOING TO DO THIS!!! OMG EVERYONE!!! RUN!!!" Why? Because it's my craziest idea yet! So I hope you all like it! The chapter after that will have somthing to do with cabbages an squirels............ MAIL ME YOUR IDEAS! IF I LIKE THEM I"LL USE THEM!!!**


	6. Big Three DDR Smack Down!

**For those who like my story; enjoy this chapter! Thank you all so much for the nice things you sent me congratulating my team and I on Regionals! I passed it along to my team and it meant so much to all of us! Visit our website and see my team! **

Percy and Anabeth were in the sword arena for the day. It was hot and they had been practicing for hours. Selina and Beckendorf were watching along with a few other campers. Percy stopped and pointed to the rules printed above the arena door, Annabeth had just cheated and broken one, so Annabeth squinted at the sign and reached in her pocket producing a pair of glasses. She pu them on and Percy's jaw dropped,

"You wear glasses?! Since when?!" he asked, clearly shocked.

"Since my dad took me to the optometrist while I was staying with him in San Francisco....." she explained.

"Well why didn't you just get contacts or somthing?"

"My dad doesn't think I should wear those...." she said.

"Oh...... hey, what do you think would happen if you wore both your glasses AND contacts at the same time? Would you have like superhuman vision?!" Percy asked in wonder.

"Oh my, we've been hitting the pudding again I see....... Yes Percy, I would have superhuman sight and say 'It's like a whole knew world!' then I would fly off singing a Disney song....... Then, because your so dumb, I would be talking to you and be floating 3 feet off the ground and when you asked what was different about me I would just say 'I got contacts!' and fly away because everyone knows that wearing contacts gives you the ability to fly....." she ranted. Percy backed away nervously. The spectators were watching the exchange and trying not to laugh when in a puff of smoke, Beckendorf vanished.

"NO!!!" cried Selina, "What's going on?!"

"Oh no..... Psirena must have gotten her copy of The Last Olympian! It IS May 5. She's making the necessary adjustments! Those who die in the book are getting erased from the story!" Annabeth yelled. The spectators all started running in circles panicking, other campers started disapearing in clouds of smoke as well. Throughout the day campers started disapearing as they died in the book. Before lunch the camp had dwindled down to almost 3/4 of what it had been before.

"She reads so freaking fast!" Percy commented.

"She does, at this rate she'll have finnished by night fall." Annabeth said. Selina came rushing up to tell them that campers had alomst completely stopped disapearing. She got within 10 feet of them when she disapeared too.

"NOT SELINA TOO!!!!" Annabeth yelled. Before the sun even set, Psirena had finnished the book....... then she got bored and decided to break her promise to make things more normal and hatched a brilliant plan!

Chiron had called a meeting in the arena to survey the loss of campers. A shadow apeared over him and grew, and grew, and grew all around him until....... SMACK!!! He was squashed by giant Dance Dance Revolution dance pads! There were 3 dance pads and everyone bliked, then suddenly, Zeus, Poiseidon, and Hades were each standing on a mat.

"Were having a little spat." Zeus explained,"and the godesses got a little tired of our quareling so they sent us here to settle our differences. We want to see which one of us is a better dancer."

The camp groaned.

"This is the work of Psirena...... no doubt about it........" Annabeth groaned. Th gods turned and Zeus pushed a button on the massive TV screen and little anime charachters bounced around the screen with the arrows the music started playing and the song was unmistakable...... Barbie Girl........ then Luke apeared in a cloud of smoke squealing, "I LOVE THIS SONG!" as he started to sing along. Percy leaned over to Annabeth and asked,"Hey, why are the gods acting like this?"

"Well, you know how if we overdose on ambrosia we'll blow up?" Percy nodded. "This is what you get when the gods have had a little too much..."

Hades was gaining points over the other 2 and laughed, "Better keep up boys!"

"Oh I think I can!" Poseidon challenged and his score skyrocketed. Zeus was doing pretty well but was still far behind the other two. Thalia apeared next to Percy and elbowed him in the ribs.

"Nothing like a little competition within the family huh, Cuz?" she laughed. Percy flinched away and hid behind Annabeth.

"What's your problem?" she asked.

"Emo people scare me....." Percy said quietly.

"Oh, that's ok! I've given that up!" she said enthusiastically as Poseidons score kept climbing. Percy stayed where he was, "Now what?" Thalia asked annoyed.

"Stalkers scare me too........"

The song drew to a close and the Big Three were still pounding away at their mats. The song ended and the scren flashed, POSEIDON WINNER!!! The other 2 cursed and kicked the DDR machine until it broke as Poseidon did a vctory dance that made Percy run out of the arena because he was so embaressed... But before the gods poofed away Poseidon waved his and in front of his face like John Cena and yelled,

"WHAT?! WHAT?! WHAT?!"


	7. PJO meets LAS

**Hey everyone.... I have some bad news.... my team and I didn't make it to Nationals...... we cried for about an hour, why? We missed our ticket to Nationals by five 100ths of a point. Talk about close. But this chapter is dedicated to and involves my teammates and our many adventures this weekend as well as my best friend. Enjoy........ ;-( Oh! BTW I used some of your guys' ideas!**

Once again, Annabeth had to provoke the author....... she yelled up at the sky because she was angry that Psirena had not kept her promise to keep things to a level of normalcy. Percy tried anxiously to calm her so that she wouldn't get everyone killed. Psirena heard Annabeth and decided to straighten her out but she couldn't do it alone, she would need the help of her synchro team mates! So she parted the clouds in the sky and rolled her wheel chair down a shaft of light into the middle of Camp Half-Blood followed by her team mates.

"Annabef," Psirena said very seriously, "We are going to teach you wonth and for all to rethpect your author." For some reason each of her team mates were all holding power tools and Chad was sitting on her shoulder.

"Did you just call me _Annabef?_" Annabeth asked. Psirena whacked her wheel chair in anger and her mermaid tail curled in frustration.

"I jusf had my pawete widener **(Palate Widener)** put in!" she yelled, "It maketh me talk funny! Get them!" The team imediately obeyed, descending on the camp. Dylan attacked Percy and with a girlish shriek he hit the ground and she started knawing on poor Percy's head. Liza punched Annabeth in the face and yelled, "Percy is mine!" and they both drew their swords and dueled for Percy. Liza pulled out a can of green spray paint and sprayed Annabeth in the face. Spiderman apeared out of no where and pointed at Annabeth and yelled, "Green Goblin!!!" and chased Annabeth using his spider like abilities as Annabeth ran screaming from his spiderness.

Grace didn't really understand what was going on so she challenged Clarisse to an armwrestling match that she greatly accepted. Grace won and when Clarisse objected Grace sicked her army of squirels on her.

Sara headed over to the Aphrodite cabin and started teaching the campers how to mix Henna mud with makeup to make it permanent. Coach Paula went with her and painted all the Aphrodite cabin's as well as her own nails the brightest shade of pink you can imagine. Talk about eyeball scorching!

Nikki headed to the Pegasai stables and started tying them all together and making them fly as she did back flips across their backs in mid air and Frankie was painting the Big House green with the LAS logo on it. After she finnished painting she went inside with Chad and sat in the closet giggling' "Hehe! Pudding! Its pudding!"

Coach Karen and Rachel (Not PJO Rachel) took PJO Rachel down to the pool Psirena created and started teaching PJO Rachel how to do synchronized swimming and Coach Karen was coaching with her ussual rhetorical questions that made PJO Rachel start spouting prophecies.

Psirena went to the border and greeted Edward Cullen who was trying to get in to claim a kid. **(He IS the god of handsomness!) **Psirena refused.

"Is there some kind of toll I can pay then?" he asked.

"Yes." Psirena replied.

"Well, what is it?"

"Let me lick you!" Psirena giggled. Edward looked disgusted but eventually gave in and covered his eyes and put out his arm. Psirena licked it and he shuddered.

"Now carry me!" Psirena demanded. He picked her up out of her wheel chair and carried her with one arm under her tail and the other under her arms in front of him. Meanwhile Emma was acussing the newly apeared Selina of being Krono's spy which lead to a "Ya-huh." "Nuh-uh" fight'

"So your telling me that those necklaces that you, Luke, AND Kronos have are just coincidences?" Emma said incredulously.

"Yes!" Selina yelled which lead to another "Ya-huh." "Nuh-uh" fight'

By the end of the day Spiderman had caught Annabeth and tied her up and gagged her with his webbing and Dylan, Liza, Rachel, Grace , Sara, Frankie, Psirena, Nikki, Coach Paula and Coach Karen, Emma , Edward Cullen AND CHAD TOO were gathered around the camp fire. They alla laughed and listened as Chad the Gay Purple Armadillo that wears a top hat **(Again, I am not implying that gay people wear top hats)** told stories about how Zac Efron needed a rape whistle.


	8. Didn't Get the Memo

**Lots of demands for more Taylor Swift parodies! Here's one!**

After they had finnished listening to Chad's stories about Zac Efron needing a rape whistle, Rachel apeared in a cloud of smoke. She coughed and waved her arms around to disipate the smoke. She realized people were watching her and she struck a pose. She had a microphone in her hand and music started playing out of now where. Apparently she hadn't read The Last Olympian yet and she thought the war was yet to come.... She started singing to Percy.

_Any day now  
They're talking war  
I can see the light that's in your eyes  
They're not talkin  
A week or two  
Oh Percy can I go with you?  
Oh Percy can I go with you?_

You pack a suitcase  
And take a picture from the wall  
I always knew this time would come  
When I ask how long  
You think you're gonna be  
You say "Eh, this crazy world's come undone"

Summer's over  
And leaves begin to fall  
And another winter's on the way  
I knew I wasn't gonna take this very well  
But I'd give everything to have you here today.

_Everyday now  
They're talking war  
I know this time has been  
Like its never been before  
We're not talking  
About a week or two  
Oh Percy can I go with you?  
Oh Percy can I go with you?  
Oh Percy can I go with you?_

She stopped and looked at Percy expectantly who didn't even glance up replying, "No." The random persone apeared and yelled, "DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"and disapeared. Then Annabeth whispered somthing in Chad's ear thatmade him smile evily and chase Rachel who ran screaming.

"what did you tell him?" Percy asked.

"That Rachel was a homophob!"


	9. Demigod Love Story

**Ok, so I am not done collecting my poll results so in the meantime I have this chapter! Enjoy!**

**Love, love, love,**

**Miranda (Psirena)**

Annabeth was in her cabin asleep when suddenly she started singing in her sleep.......;

We were both young when I first saw you  
I close my eyes  
And the flashback starts  
I'm standing there  
In the Big House in summer air

See the fight  
See the Minotaur, the showdown  
I see you make your way up Half-Blood Hill  
And watch you drool, little did I know

That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles  
And our parents said stay away from Juliet  
And I was crying under the volcano

You were begging me 'please go', and I thought

Romeo don't make me leave you all alone  
I'll keep fighting 'til there's left to do is run  
You'll be the God and I'll be the Goddess  
It's a love story baby just say yes

So I sneak past the Harpies to see you  
We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they heard  
So close your eyes  
Escape this camp for a little while

'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter  
And my mother said stay away from Juliet  
But you were everything to me  
I was begging you please don't go and I said

Romeo don't make me leave you all alone  
I'll keep fighting 'til there's left to do is run  
You'll be the God and I'll be the Goddess  
It's a love story baby just say yes

Romeo save me, I really don't know how to feel  
This love is difficult, but it's real  
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess  
It's a love story baby just say yes  
Oh oh

I got tired of waiting  
Wondering if you were really going to live

But my faith in you wasn't fading  
When I met you in the dinning pavilion, and I thought  
Romeo save me I've been feeling so alone  
I keep waiting for you but you never come  
Is this in my head? I don't know what to think  
He opened his mouth and told me what I needed to hear

And said, c'mon Juliet  
You'll never have to be alone  
I love you and that's all I really know  
I talked to your mom, she won't try to kill me  
It's a love story baby just say yes

Oh, oh, oh, oh  
'Cause we were both young when I first saw you

Then Annabeth woke with a start as she was viciously beaten with pillows by her siblings who were yelling, "SHUT UP DAMNIT!!! YOUR SINGING IS AWFU!!! SHUT UP!!!"


	10. DAMN!

**I seriously didn't think it was possible but you guys did it! You cheered me up! I would have updated sooner but I have been very sick for the past few days. I want to synchronized swimming practice and ended up puking all over the deck before I even got into the water. But you know what? THAT WON'T STOP ME FROM WRITING!!!! And you all have been so lovely in your support! Here's a new chapter for all my lovely readers!**

Thalia was tired. Tired of what? Of not getting what she wanted of course! She was older and more powerful than Nico but still he found ways to escape her and there was only on way so solve this. The solution? Rope. She ran to the newly constructed Hades cabin and let herself in. She stood over a sleeping and oblivious Nico in the black and desolate room. She pulled a rope out of the bag she carried and proceded to tie his arms and legs with the rope and connected them to sticks. Nico still snoozed. She used the ropes to cary him over to the ampitheatre without waking him up and gathered all the other campers into the theatre as well. She positioned Nico on the stage and climbed to the top and dangled him like a puppet in front of all to see. She pointed off stage signaling Percy to hit the music. Percy pressed a button on the massive speakers and Carmelldansen blared loud and clear.

Nico started awake and looked around. The introduction to the song ended and Thalia moved him to dance the Carmelldansen dance. The song made Nico think about pink and little animals and tutus. It was one of those horrible sonds that you couldn't help but dance to.

Annabeth watched from the audience and giggled hysterically when Percy followed Thalia's lead and strung Clarisse up there. Then, an idea struck her. She went looking for Chad. She wanted to do the same. She only reached just beyond the arena's entrance and she spotted him. But he was already dancing Carmelldansen with Winnie The Pooh. Annabeth she didn't even want to know why. She trudged back inside, defeated. She returned to her seat and wondered why everyone was so hyped up today and decided it must have ben the stash of lemon frosting they had all found in the Hermes Cabin the night before. Nothing apeals more to a demigod deprived of sugar than sugar. Carmelldansen played for hours on end with the only dancing break being the introduction.

At about noon everyone had grown bored and started taking turns doing somthing on the stage. The Hermes did a magic trick, it made the contents of everyone's pockets mysteriously disapear. The Ares cabin bored everyone with weight lifting. The Aphrodite cabin started using the stage as if it were a cat walk. Those who complained about it were attacked with their special permanent make up. Then it was the Demeter cabin's turn. They all cleared their throats and sang the recycling song from The Emperor's New Groove. Everyone goaned.

When all was said and done the Apollo cabin left everyone with an inspirational haiku. At which time the Random Person burst in and yelled "DAMN!!!" everyone was cunfused as to why he was there and apparently so was he. Percy just put a hand on his shoulder and said,

"Epic Fail........"


	11. Fearlessly Gay

**Annabeth started singing in her sleep as she does after a long day.**

There's somethin' 'bout the way  
The sea looks when it's just rained  
There's a glow like your eyes

Walk me to the camp  
And you know I wanna ask you to duel right there  
In the middle of the arena  
Yeah  
Oh yeah

We're walking through the camp

I wonder if you know  
I'm tryin' so hard not to get caught up now  
But you're just so cool  
Run your hands through your hair  
Absent mindedly makin' me want you

And I don't know how it gets better than this  
You take my hand and drag me head first  
Fearless  
And I don't know why when with you I'd fight  
In a storm in my best dress **(Yes, fighting in a storm in a good dress. All girly girls of the world cringe.)**  
Fearless

So baby walk slow  
'Til we run out of road in this one god camp  
I wanna stay right here in this duel with you  
You put your eyes on me  
In this moment now capture it, remember it

Cuz I don't know how it gets better than this  
You take my hand and drag me head first  
Fearless  
And I don't know why but with you I'd fight

In a storm in my best dress  
Fearless

Well you stood there with me in the pavillion  
My hands shake  
I'm not usually this way but  
I pull you in and I'm a little more brave  
It's the first kiss,  
It's flawless,  
Really something,  
It's fearless.

Oh yeah  
And I don't know how it gets better than this  
You take my hand and drag me head first  
Fearless  
And I don't know why but with you I would fight  
In a storm in my best dress  
Fearless

Yeah  
I don't know how  
Oh yeah yeah

And that's where Annabetj woke up. She had been strung upside down from a tree by her angry siblings and they were now beating her like a pinata. They all laft but Chad the gay purple armadillo that wears a top hat **(I'm not suggesting that gay people wear top hats) **walked up to her and slepped her across the face. Then in his strange english accent he said,

"Percy is MINE, bitch"


	12. Out With A Bang

**Today I write a chapter. One chapter. Just one. I promised one of my readers one last chapter. They left a particular review that brought me to tears. I wished I could give them something in exchange for the wonderfully kind words they sent me. It meant so much to me. I really love you all and I didn't want to stop the story. I'm not saying that you cheered me up completely and that the story is starting back up again. It isn't. This is just a chapter for all the kind words of encouragement and love that you sent. So without further adieu, the last chapter in MY most cherished story. **

Nearly a month had passed and the camp had returned to normal. People went to archery lessons and sword dueling without any interuption from Psirena. Annabeth was overjoyed but everyone else missed her. Another week went by and people gave up on trying to bring Psirena back. They all wanted to see Chad again! Not Psirena! Just Chad!

One day as the sun came up over the ocean, everyone turned to see that Charlie the Unicorn was running across the top of the water right into camp. He reached the beach and as soon as his hooves touched the sand he and his other unicorn friends were surounded by a throng of demigods. The purple unicorn started talking,

"Charlie is everything. All that once was and all that will be. Charlie controls time and space, love and death! Charlie can see into your mind! Charlie can see into your soul!!!

"Really? Charlie can do all that?" Percy asked.

"HaHa , no." The pink one laughed.

"Then what are you talking about?" Percy asked.

"They stole my kidney and my horn so they owe me. That's why they say that." Charlie said. He picked up his leg and kicked the purple one in the side. The purple one screamed, "Ahhh!!! Everyone bow before the amazing Charlie!!!"

The campers all laughed. Then a strange gangsta shrimp jumped out of no where and started rapping,

Lungfish, Blackfish, Alligator, Ice Fish, Armor Head, Hammerhead, Anaconda, Flathead, Manta Ray, Sting Ray, Fangtooth Moray, Goblin Shark, Grass Carp, Round River Bat Ray, Noodle Fish, Hagfish, Man o'war, Ladyfish, Black Eel, Baby Eel, Sprat, Koi, Electric Eel, Lampray, Peierey, Yellow-Edged Moray, Salmon Shark, Sleeper Shark, Featherback, Eagle Ray!

When Percy started to join in Annabeth whacked him over the head using Nico as a club. The shrimp exploded into flames. When the Aphrodite kids took a real interest in in the unicrons and started asking about where they came from they sang in unison, "Candy Mountain! Candy Mountain! Fills me with sweet sugary goodness!"

"What's that?" One of the girls asked.

"Its a land of sweets and joy and joyness!" The Aphrodite girls squealed at the news.

"IS IT PINK?!" They all shreiked.

"Cherry ribbons stream across the sky and to the ground...." The pink unicorn mused. The girls squealed again. Meanwhile, Chad popped out of no where and started riding Charlie like a cowboy.

"Ye-hah!" Chad yelled in his funny english accent. Percy ran screaming away from Chad. (He had heard about the mishap with Annabeth.) He ran straight toward her and hid behind her. Charlie freaked out and bucked Chad off his back. Chad stood up and started singing "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne. Every camper backed away from him cautiously.

Suddenly the pink unicorn screamed, "zOMG! Seagulls!!!!!" The other unicorns screamed and disappered in a cloud of smoke. Replacing them was Psirena.

"Your back?!" Annabeth yelled.

"Nope, just came to say goodbye. Thought you all deserved it."

"I had no idea I had done somthing so bad I deserved this." Annabeth replied. Psirena turned her into a frog.

"Now Percy has to kiss you to return you to normal!" Psirena laughed. The fangirls all appeared and squealed. Annabeth ribbited.

"On top of that, that won't happen for a while because..." Psirena waved her hand and A mountain of chocolate pudding cups apeared in front of Percy who dove head first into the mountain. The men in white coats immediately appeared and waited until Percy needed them. From inside the pudding cups he giggled, "Hehe! Pudding!" The pegasai started ramming their heads into the sides of the stable again trying to make the flurry of Percy's thought go away.

Taylor Swift and Rachel apeared and Taylor slapped Rachel right across the face and disappeared. The random person showed up right on cue and and yelled, "DAMN!!!!!!!!!!"

Chad made explosion noises and Thalia held Nico's ankles. She held him upside down and played 'If Your Happy And You Know It' while screaming, "CLAP UNDERWORLD BOY!!! CLAP!!!" Nico clapped.

Spiderman showed up and started chasing frog Annabeth again screaming, "GREEN GOBLIN!!!!"

The Ares cabin started randomly dancing to Carramelldansen against their will.

Edward Cullen picked Psirena up and carried her into the sunset. She yelled over her shoulder,

"Thought I should go out with a bang!!!" Then, she licked Edward Cullen and disapeared with him into the sunset. The pink unicorn apeared again and yelled, "SHUN THE NON-BELIEVERS!!!! SHUN!!!!!!" at the wrong time. Percy put a hand on the unicorns back and murmered,

"Epic fail........."

**THE END**


	13. Somebody's Gonna Get Effed Up!

**Now everybody, all together now!!!!! And..... GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *global happy dance* Whooo!!!!!!!!!! Just so you know I was Caramelldansen for 3 hours with my team mates to come up with this chapter!!! No joke!!!**

Annabeth (still in frog form) jumped into the mountain of pudding as soon as Psirena left. Percy was eating it all so fast he almost didn't realize when he made lip contact with froggy Annabeth and she changed back. He slowly realized that wet frog lips had just touched his and started coughing and sputtering in disgust.

"EW! I'm never eating pudding again!" he shouted as he ran to a random and strangly convenient hover craft nearby. He got in and sped out to sea hovering across the top of the rolling water. Annabeth dusted herself off unecessarily and smiled, glad to be back in her human... well half human... form. They watched Percy's hover craft disappear beyond the horizon for a few seconds and then come racing back. He reached the shore again and hopped out of his hover craft. The seats of the hover craft were overflowing with eels and ..... spanish books? Yes, Spanish books.

"I understand hw you got the eels from out there on the ocean but the spanish books?" Annabeth said. Percy just shrugged. The Jonas Brothers apeared and so did Chad the gay purple armadillo that wears a top ha **(I'm not saying that gay people wear top hats)** and has a funny english accent. They all started playing Poison Ivy.

"Stop it! We get it! No body likes itchy poison ivy! We got it! There's no need to write a song about it! Your just saying the same thing over and over!" Percy acussed.

"Shut up Percy!" Annabeth said, "Its more than that! It's deeper... It's Nicks poetic soul..." she sighed and Percy gagged. Psirena apeared and grabbed a confused Nick who kept singing.

"He's mine! So is Han Solo and Luke Skywalker and Edward Elric and Edward Cullen!" Psirena said.

"Whoa, whoa , whoa! You can HAVE all those other guys but Luke Skywalker and Edward Elric are SO MINE!" Annabeth shot back.

"Oh no you didn't! Somebody's gonna get F#$ed up!"

"Bring it!" They start fighting and Chad grabbed a random whicker basket and stuffs all the eels inside.

"Why are you taking all the eels?" Percy asked.

"It's sushi night at my Gay Club. I guess I'l bring some Inari." he said simply in his funny english accent, "Hey, wanna come?"

"Heck no!" Percy replied immediately. But Chad pounced on him and tied him up. He started dragging Percy and his basket of eels away.

"HEY! Where's MY rape whistle?!" he yelled. Annabeth stopped fighting with Psirena and looked over at him.

"Why don't you ask RACHEL?" she said. Everyone in the camp yelled "DAMN!!!" Rachel stood nochalantly off to the side spinning a whistle on her finger that has Percy's name engraved on it. She realized what was happening and hid it behind her back. Everyone looked at her questioningly.

"What? He picked ANNABETH remember?"

"No, why are you HERE?" one camper asked.

"Oh, I have no idea.." she replied.

Luke Skywalker and Edard Elric apeared out of no where and started dueling. It was quite the epic battle. Emma apeared and gave Psirena and Annabeth some popcorn and they all sat down to watch the battle. After much monologing about who was better and insults thrown from Ed's side and mean glances from Luke's everyone said in unison,

"Somebody's gonna get F#$ed up!"

**Ok, I know it wasn't my best but I thought it was fun! Ok, so wanna know how screwed up I am? I thought about making Percy return. Bu when he comes back everyone realizes he's walking funny.... I decided NOT to put that in there.... It's just so WRONG. If you don't get it ask someone ELSE to explain it to you. Chad is NOT a rapist! That's why i didn't put it in there. There I kinda explained it... Don't kill me! Lots of love to you all! See you either later this week or in 3 weeks. Estoy Triste! Review! Review! Review!**


	14. That's My Gay Lover!

**I haven't been on in so long! I think I might be going insane! Oh, wait... I was ALREADY insane! That's whatmakes this story possible! PJO On Crack; Brought to you by........... MIRANDA'S INSANITY!!!! A name, you can trust................ Oh, by the way. I'm on Facebook now! SO friend me! Look up Miranda Marquez and I'm t he one that goes to Canyon High School in Santa Clarits California! And, all the stuff in this chapter really did happen minus the cannon of course. Just imagine me as Percy and the other characters as my synchro friends from around the world....**

The sun had risen above the camp and the day light shone through the windows of Percy's cabin like a thousand little pionts of light all hugging his body with their warmth in celebration of the new day...... **(*vomits* Oh, God... Ok, sorry that was just so cheezy.... BACK TO THE STORY!) **So Percy hopped out of bed and got ready for breakfast. He sprinted down to the eating pavilion and was greeted by smoked ham, the breakfast of champions. Literally. He looked around for Annabeth but he didn't see her. It wasn't like her to be late and he considered going back to find her but as soon as he spotted the bacon, he thought better of it and dove in head first.

Once Percy finished breakfast he went to check on Annabeth. She never showed up to breakfast. When he got to the cabin he saw Annabeth on her way out acompained by Clarisse.

"Well, they don't have any protein...." Percy caught from their conversation. He figured they MUST have been talking about breakfast so he decided to interject.

"Ya, they do. Bacon." he said. Annabeth just looked at him strangely.

"Umm... no they don't...." she said.

"Well, actually your right. They don't have bacon ANYMORE......" Percy admitted slightly embaressed that he was the cause of the lack of bacon.

"They never have and never WILL have bacon Percy..." Annabeth insisted.

"I was just there and they had bacon! I'm telling you, they have protein!!! Bacon is a source of protein and they have it!!!" He insisted.

"So, your telling me that there is bacon in mangoes.......????" she said.

"Huh?"

"Clarisse and I were just talking about how much we liked dried mangoes and I said I could probably live off of them. They've got sugars and antioxidants and potasium and stuff but then I realized that I couldn't live off of them because they didn't have any protein......" Annabeth explained slowly and clearly so that even Percy could understand.

"Oh...." was his genius reply, "Anyway! I have to call my friend from school!"

"Friend from school? Who is he?" Clarisse asked.

"Not he, she." Percy said. Annabeth's jaw dropped.

"What?! Did you NOT read The Last Olympian?! Do I have to sing, AGAIN?!" she was almost hysterical.

"What do you mean?" he said as he pressed 'Talk' on his cell phone. Annabeth was shocked and hurt that he risked using a cell phone at camp just to talk to this girl.

"Hey Rachel!" he said into the phone.

"RACHEL?!?!" Annabeth shreiked.

"Not Dare, her last name is Preale." Percy said as he waved his arm at her telling her to be quiet so that he could talk. Percy realized that his plan to make Annabeth jealous was working. He really didn't like this girl but she fit into his 'plan' well. But little did the others know that Clarisse was forming a plan too. She ripped the phone out of Percy's hand and quickly yelled into the mouthpiece; "PERCY IS TOTALLY IN LOVE WITH YOU!!!" and handed the phone back.

"Who was that? Was that a guy?" Rachel said on the other line. Percy SO didn't want this girl to think that he was in love with her and found him self sudenly blurting,

"YA! THAT WAS A GUY! IN FACT! THAT WAS MY GAY LOVER!" he shouted and then hung up. Clarisse punched him. She definitely was NOT a guy and walked away. Suddenly she was atacked by Chad out of no where who was screaming, "If anyone gets to be Percy's gay lover it's me!!!"

Annabeth started cracking up..... She understood now what had just happened.

"Your gonna pay for that!" She called over her shoulder as she ran toward her cabin laughing. Percy dreaded what he knew was coming....

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Later that night Percy was hoarding his pudding like he did every night before bed. Someone knocked on his cabin's door.

"Who is it?!" he called through the door.

"Its your gay lover! I've come to make out with you!" he recognized the voice as Annabeth's.

"Annabeth?" He said as he opened the door. No sooner had he opened the door than he found himself being pelted with JELL-O. Annabeth was shooting it out of a cannon!!!

WTF?!, Percy thought as he was hit with another blast of JELL-O.

"Gotcha!" Annabeth squealed as she ran away laughing. Percy chased after her with the intent to hug her and share the JELL-Oy goodness with her, when on his nightstand a scream went un-heard; his pudding cup screamed as a little tear rolled down its packaging,

"NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


	15. SUPER AWESOMENESS!

**zOMG everyone! I have my bestest friends over and we have CHOCOLATE PUDDING!!!! AND FROSTING!!!! AND JELL-O!!!!!!!!!**

**Bob: I made slurping noises!**

**Emma: BLEH!**

**So anyway..... I have compiled ALL of my ideas into ONE BIG ULTRA MEGA SUPER AWESOME MINDBLOWING EYEBROW SEARING CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had to make up for my lack of summertime updates somehow! So enjoy everyone!**

**Emma: A guy in a jeep just drove by the window!**

**Bob: *slurping sound***

**-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

One morning Annabeth woke up to the delicious smell of peaches and waffles. A strange combination to say the least but strangly it smelled wonderful! She followed her nose to the dinning pavillion where she met Percy. He was wearing an apron that read "Kiss the Demi-God!" with lipstick lips on each cheek.

"Hey Annabeth! I made waffles for you!"

"You just don't want to be shot with my JELL-O cannon again...." she said grogily. Suddenly Chad popped up from behind Percy's shoulder, "That's correct!" Chad said in his funny english accent. Maybe I should clarify, Chad is a gay purple armadillo that has a funny english accent and funny claw hand thingies that wears a top hat. (I'n not implying that gay people wear top hats.)

"So how was your night?" Percy asked. Annabeth stayed quiet....

*flashback*

It was a hard day and Annabeth was fast asleep when.......

"Summer camp beneath the stars  
on the beach behind your cabin  
You and I have made plans fror war Sometimes we don't need a thing  
Just let it all fall into place  
Everything I need will be right there by my side

And I know everything about you  
I don't wanna fight without you

I'll pick up when you're knocked down  
We gotta fight so we don't end up underground  
Sometimes its just our duelsa  
Well, you drive me crazy half the time  
The other half I'm next to you against Kronos  
To let you know that what I feel is true  
And I don't wanna fight without you!

Just a half-blood boy and girl  
Living in an Olympian's world  
Trying to figure out what is and isn't good And though I try to hide my tears  
God's secrets are our deepest fears  
Through it all nobody suffers like you do

And you know you could destroy us all  
You know that you can't live without me

I'll pick up when you're knocked down  
We gotta fight so we don't end up underground  
Sometimes its just our duelsa  
Well, you drive me crazy half the time  
The other half I'm next to you against Kronos  
And I don't wanna fight without you!

And I don't wanna fight without you  
When I'm with anybody else  
It's so hard to be myself  
And only you can't tell

I'll pick up when you're knocked down  
We gotta fight so we don't end up underground  
Sometimes its just our duelsa  
Well, you drive me crazy half the time  
The other half I'm next to you against Kronos  
And I don't wanna fight without you!"

While her cabins mates screamed,

"Stop singing like a squirel with a popped lung!" "You sound like a dying cow!"

*end flashback*

"Uneventful..." she replied.

"So, I figured we should do something exciting he said as Chad climbed into the waffle iron giggling, "Hehe! Tanning bed!"

"Like what?" she asked ignoring Chad.

"Nico is at camp...." he mused flashing an evil grin.

"Bring it!" Annabeth laughed as Percy set a large plate of peach waffles in front of her. Were waffles supposed to be orange? She didn't think so.... So she pushed it away and they headed to Nico's cabin. Inside Nico was performing some strange pagen ritual but Percy and Annabeth just marched straight in and grabbed him by the colar dragging him out to the stage. Percy took a tube of glitter and dumped it on Nico's head. Nico started screaming like he was possesed and thrashed like he had been hit with holy water.

"What is that stuff?" Annabeth asked.

"Its synchronized swimming glitter. It multipies inexplicably." he explained while Nico thrashed like he was convulsing. He was more terrified of these two than he was of Thalia. Annabeth dragged Nico to her cabin and tossed him onto her bed. Above her bed was a collage of Robert Pattinson pictures. Nico screamed, "AH!!!!! PRETTY BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!" Chad popped out of no where and mumbled sadly, "Ya and Psirena won't buy him for me......" and with that he stomped out of the room.

Annabeth reached over to her purple boom box and hit play. Hannah Montana started blasting and Nico screamed again, "ANYTHING BUT THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he tried to smash his head against the wall but Percy restrained him as he laughed uproariously. Thalia popped out of no where and helped Percy.

"Now that you've done this FOR me I suppose I should tell you that I put JELL-O in Annabeth's dinner and that's what makes her sing in her sleep!"

"WHAT?!" Annabeth screeched. "HAHA! YOU SING IN YOUR SLEEP?!" Percy laughed. Thalia handed Percy a Monster drink and Percy sped away without ever touching the ground. He kept running but stopped when he heard someone making noises that sounded oddly like a monkey. It was Chad.

"What are you doing?" Percy asked as Chad hit another Kung-fu pose.

"Training to become a ninja! OOH OH!" he replied.

"That's great!" Percy exclaimed giving him a thumbs up as he continued running at light speed. He hopped into his hover craft and no one saw him for 3 days.

Three days later, Annabeth asked him where he'd been, to which he repied,

"I joined the Teen Titans and replaced Aqualad for a while, we defeated PhsycoTech and so I left in my hover craft and went to Olympus to Ding-Dong-Ditch them but I got distracted by a story on Olympus Television. Apparently Zeus likes to sing to the Backstreet Boys in the shower and now even his rubber ducky won't bathe with him anymore." He rushed. Annabeth thought sadly about how her teddy bear wouldn't sleep with her for the same reason......

"That's probably just a rumor.." she said.

"Than explain THIS." he said as he shoved a random TV in her face. It showed Zeus IN the shower with his rubber ducky cowering in the corner as he sang, 'Quit Playing Games With My Heart' very badly.

"I could have lived my entire life and died happily without ever seeing that." Annabeth shuddered.

"I know, right?" Percy laughed. "Ok, now come with me!" He said as he grabbed her hand and pulled her toward his hover craft which had apparetly been suped up with enormous speakers and a microphone. He pulled her inside along with him and they started hovering above the camp.

"THIS IS ZEUS SPEAKING!!!!" Percy said in a deep voice into his microphone. Annabeth was stunned that he would do something so stupid. Impersonating a god?! But she didn't have alot of time to think anything more because they soon found themselves in a very large blue squishy room.

"YES!!!!!!!!" Percy enthused. "It worked!" He laughed insanely.

"Erre es Korakas Pudding! I will have your soul! This is the final straw!!!!!!!!!! She stood up and snapped her fingers. They suddenly found themselves on a boat with Grover.

"Percy, Psirena is always by the water. I want you to sense her out." Annabeth commanded.

"Ummm..... I don't sense her...." Percy said. Annabeth grabbed him by the neck and forced his head into the water,

"CAN YOU SENSE HER NOW?!" she yelled. SHe released him and he pulled his comlpetely dry head out and just stared at her. "I don't know what you were trying to acomplish doing that, I mean it's not like I was gonna get wet...." he sighed. Annabeth grabbed him and thrust his head into the water again. "GET WET DAMNIT!!!!"

"Ummm.... whyy am I here...?" Grover asked shyly.

"Comedic relief." Annabeth said as she released Percy's head. "Monkey!!!!" she shouted randomly. She clamped her hands over her mouth and her eyes widened in surprise. They sudddenly found themselves in an elevator with Chad. Percy noticed the buttons and pressed the one that read, "Top of page." and they shot upward. The elevator opened and Chad started practicing his ninja moves. They all hurried out of ther elevator and turned in time to see the elevator plumet to the ground and Chad scream like a little girl on a roller coaster in delight.

They were in an aquarium and Psirena in all her mermaidness swam in mid.....water..... infront of them. Annabeth opened her mouth to say something but Psirena interupted by sending them back to camp saying,

"Get over it."


	16. BEST STORY EVER!

** Hi everyone! Sorry I haven't updated in a while! Emma and I are no longer friends so I didn't have any crackness to spring on someone that would be good enough for the story but th good news is.... I DON'T NEED HER!!!!!!!! That's right!!!!! Mwahahahah!!!!!!!! Oops! Sorry, lost my head there for a second! So anyway, this was the last idea I had from being friends with her and a bunch of new ones! I need reviews though people! I only get like 7 reviews a chapter and that makes me sad! Btw, I changed my screen name to Miranda Of The Tempest because Psirena is my book character and I am nothing like her. I also wanted to say, READ MY OTHER STORIES!!! PLEASE!!! REVIEW THEM!!! This story is everyone's favorite so I feel like my other stories get neglected! Once my other stories have some new reviews I will give you all 2, that's right, 2 new chapters of PJO On Crack!!!! I know this chapter is really short but I really just posted it to see how many people were still with me! Enjoy!**

**---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

Annabeth and Percy were in the archery range when they heard strange squeals of pealing laughter coming from the Ares cabin. They thought that for sure something must be going wrong if a child of Ares was laughing because that probably meant that they would have to call the camp's medics for the poor little camper that was hurt. Annabeth and Percy burst through the Ares cabin doors to find Clarisse rolling on the ground laughing hysterically. Chris sat on her bed looking confused.

"What in the name of Poseidon is going on in here?" Percy said. Clarisse had big fat tears rolling down her face.

"You know how Chris lost his mind in the labyrinth? And Dionysus cure him of his madness? Well some times he has litle mental breaks now and then and their down right hysterical!" Clarisse laughed.

"That's terrible!" Annabeth shouted. She assumed that Clarisse was making fun of Chris' horibble event but she was dead wrong because the just then something astounding happened. The air conditioner in the cabin kicked on. The old thing was so loud it made a couple banging sounds as it turned on.

"There's a hamster on the roof!" Chris whispered to Annabeth as if it were some big secret.

"I think he might be in a ball!" Chris giggled and Annabeth did too.

"You know what?" Chris whispered into Percy's ear.

"What?" Percy asked.

"There are tools living in the wall!"

"No way!" Percy said. Chris nodded excitedly and continued,"Ya! When they made this cabin some tools fell between the wals nd they forgot about them. And at night............they talk! Know what else?"

"What?"

"I like to pet kitties!" Chris giggled as he pulled away from Percy to stroke his imaginary cat. Clarisse started laughing all over again.

"Hey Clarisse!" Chris waved an arm at her to come closer. She did. "I have a story for you."

"Im listening."

"Okay, so a farmer is sheering his sheep and he has them all lined up to be shorn. Well One of them is very impatient and for every one sheep the farmer sheers the impatient sheep jumps over 2 other so he can get closer to the front of the line. But after 6 sheep he gets bored and lights the rest on FIRE!!!!!"

Percy started clapping wildly, "Best. Story. Ever."


	17. Sacrifices and Speaking Greek

**Um, hello again... Sorry I've been gone for a littlw while.... heh heh...... *nervous sweating* I've just been really busy and now I feel really bad for not updating. Emma and I are friends again and all is cool and fruity, Yes I really did just say that. There will be another chapter up tomorrow as well so don't worry. Review or else I won't update tomorrow! That review # needs to go up. Thank you and enjoy.**

It was a normal day as far as normal days go in Camp Half-Blood. The only difference was that today a volcano had mysteriously apeared in the middle of the camp. Annabeth was inspecting it furiously. She ran all over it looking and taking in every inch of the mysterious mountain. She was so angry because she knew that this was the work of Psirena.

"Psirena!" She yelled up at the sky as Percy emerged from his cabin to try to calm her flaming temper. A shaft of light shot down from the sky and Psirena rolled down it on her wheel chair with a purple armadillo perched on her shoulder. His name was Chad and he was a gay purple armadillo with a funny english accent, a top hat, (I'm not suggesting that gay people wear top hats) and funny claw hand thingys. Psirena descended all the way onto the ground and Chad hid in her long hair shyly. Her tail and scaled bikini shimmered brightly in the sunlight.

"Can I help you?" she said seductively to Percy. Percy hid behind Annabeth and Annabeth's temper flamed brighter.

"What the hell have you done?!" Annabeth nearly shreiked.

"I believe I can answer that." another voice said. It hadn't come from anyone visible. Suddenly a girl popped out of no where and stood next to where Psirena and Chad had just been. They were gone. The girl laughed. She had short black hair and brown eyes. She was short and dressed in a Robin costume minus the mask. The costume was a girl-ifyed Robin with a green mini skirt and long plastic boots.

"I am Miranda." she said. She noticed how she was dressed and snapped her fingers turning the costume into a sparkly black skirt and white tshirt.

"What happened to Psirena? How did she bring you here?" Annabeth said, stunned by what had just happened.

"Psirena brought me here? Ha! I created Psirena! Therefore I have more power!" she snorted.

"What?!" Annabeth's jaw dropped.

"That's right. I am not Psirena. I am Miranda." Annabeth shook her head as if to clear it.

"I don't really care. What is that volcano doing here?" Annabeth said pointing to the massive landform.

"You wanna know something? My left ear isn't really an ear. It's a portal to Chad." Miranda said as she crossed her arms over her chest and leaned on one leg.

"What? No, look I just want to know why there's a giant vol- Is that Nico?" she said as she looked at the top of the volcano at a figure dragging another up to the top of the volcano. It was Nico and he was dressed in a black Snuggie like the ones you see on TV dragging Chris up to the volcano's mouth.

"Snuggies are actually the uniform of the volcano god cult." Miranda pointed out absently waving her hand at it like it was nothing.

"Let's go stop him! This can't be good!" Percy yelled as he pulled Annabeth after him up the volcano to Nico and Chris.

"Nico? What are you doing now....?" Percy sighed.

"Sacrifice to volcano god!" Nico shouted waving his arms around menacingly over a bound and gagged Chris. "Every 100 years volcano comes up looking for one sacrifice! If a sacrifice is not given the camp will be terorized by vampire fruit snacks that feed upon our burritos in the night! Chris is annoying! He is my sacrifice!"

"Well okay then." Percy said as he started walking back down the volcano. Annabeth started following Percy down, "That's it?!"

"That's it." Percy said cooly.

"We're just going to let him sacrifice Chris like that to some volcano god?!"

"Yep."

"Your nuts!" Annabeth shook her head.

"Look Annabeth, I don't know about you but I like my burritos not being eaten by vampire fruit snacks in the night!" Percy yelled.

"Your right...." Annabeth sighed.

"Besides, Chris IS annoying." Percy said.

"One hell of a story teller though." Annabeth noted.

"Ya...... Oh well!" Percy cheered as he ran down the rest of the mountain.

Raven from the Teen Titans had shown up when they left and she and Nico were becoming VERY good friends. Ah.... emo love........

Percy started speaking ancient greek for no reason at all and Annabeth couldn't understand what he was saying because he was talking so fast.

"Hold still." she said and smacked him right across the face. No luck. Then Rachel apeared in a puff of smoke and kissed Percy before disappearing again.

"It worked!" Percy cheered. Annabeth grabbed a microphone,

"It's strange to think the battles we used to fight, the Titans, the swords everything, is gone

Today I found out about you,  
even now just looking at you feels wrong  
You say that you'd take it all back given the one chance it was a moment of greekness and you said yes

You should have said no  
You should have asked me  
You should have thought twice,  
before you let it all go  
You should have known that word  
that what you did with her would get back to me  
(get back to me)  
And I was right there there,

Not just in your  
your mind  
I shouldn't be asking myself why,  
You should be begging for forgiveness,  
at my feet  
You should have said no,  
baby and you would not speak greek

You can see that I've been crying  
Baby you know all the right things,  
To say  
But do you honestly expect me to believe  
We could ever be the same  
You said that the past is the past  
You need one chance it was a moment of weakness and you said yes

You should have said no  
You should have asked me  
You should have thought twice,  
before you let it all go  
You should have known that word  
that what you did with her would get back to me  
(get back to me)  
And I was right there,

Not just in your mind  
I shouldn't be asking myself why,  
You should be begging for forgiveness,  
at my feet  
You should have said no,  
baby and you wouldn't speak greek

I cant resist, before you go tell me this,  
was it worth it,  
was she worth this

Nooo  
No no no no no

You should have said no  
You should have asked me  
You should have thought twice,  
before you let it all go  
You should have known word  
that what you did with her would get back to me  
(get back to me)  
And I was right there,

not in  
your mind  
I shouldn't be asking myself why,  
You should be begging for forgiveness,  
at my feet  
You should have said no,  
baby and you might still have me"

She dropped the mic and walked away.

Percy just stood there before asking, "Is it just me or did none of what she sang even happen?"

Taylor Swift - Should Have Said No Ringtone  
Taylor Swift - Should Have Said No MP3 Download


	18. Beans

**Kya! I got so busy today that I didn't find a break to update! This chapter is going to be short but oh so random! Tomorrow I'll have a halloween webshow with all my friends (My co-writers) and I on YouTube on my channel LASynchro. Review!**

Chad had a new friend, Hayzeas, pronounced Jesus. He was a frickin seahorse. He and Chad and Sparky (The emo mute blue bird with a God complex) all had their own cabin in camp half blood.

Instead of training for battle they raised beans. These were not any ordinary beans. These beans were like little miniature chibi people who hissed when you didn't feed them but they were called beans none the less.

They were small and adorable and very squishable. They only ate doughnuts and were easily angered. They were very agressive and ate your shoes if you were mean to them. If you were nice to them they would sleep on your foot.

To avoid having any of Chad's designer shoes eaten they read them stories like Frosting and the Beast and Black Squirels named Courtney which strangely calmed them. The beans were never very happy unless they had cupcakes to sit on.

Sparky baked cupcakes day and night to keep the little beans happy because nothing is more rewarding than a happy bean sleeping on your foot. Sometimes they even slept inside of Chad's top hats. Silly beans...........

One day all the beans layed eggs because bean's have no gender and are all asexual. So all the little beans had bean eggs and they all grew up to be adorable little regular beans.

No body knew about the beans except for Chad, Sparky, and Hayzeas. One day Kanye West really pissed them off and they (Being Taylor Swift fans) gathered their beans and sent them after Kanye. When they brought Kanye back they made a large bon fire and chanted many things and the cute little beans danced all around. Soon they tossed Kanye into the flames and he started screaming. Chad grabbed a microphone and said, "Hold on there Kanye, I'm gonna let you finnish but I just wanted to say that Joan of Arc had the best bon fire of all time!"


	19. Poetic Beg

**Miranda needs some motivation,**

**For a new chappie's creation,**

**If you want me to be happy,**

**Tell me what's your favorite chappie!**

**I won't scream or run around,**

**Or even throw stuff on the ground,**

**Until more reviews do I take,**

**No more chapies will I make,**

**Reviews instead shall be your savior,**

**Then maybe I'll do you a favor,**

**New will be the next PJOOn Crack,**

**Where Nico's head Thalia does whack,**

**Nico will love him some Twilight,**

**The campers will lose all their sight,**

**Nico will be reading Eclipse,**

**Everyone thinks it's the Apocoplyse!**

**Review! Review! You must do!**

**And get some more of the crew!**


	20. Tape and Gay Fanboys

**Hey everyone! What's up?! I haven't updated a REAL chapter since Halloween so I was feeling bad... I was reading ALL of my 380 reviews and almost died laughing at the few flames I had. You all are so wonderful, you keep this story running with your reviews and love. I don't know if I told you but over the summer I didn't update as often as I had planned to because I was at summer camp and was also working my butt off to get on the highest team on my club team. (Synchronized Swimming) And that during try-outs I was thinking of you all and you drove me on to work hard so that I coulod tell you that I made it. I did make it and am not competing on the National scene. I thank you all for that. Competition season is coming up which means more of the smelly coffee geletin, being cooped up in hotel rooms for long periods of time and my synchro girls that all contribute to the creation of this fic. More chapters more often soon. Thanks! Review!**

Everyone in Camp Half-Blood was eating lunch peacefully when a helicopter landed on the Hermes cabin roof and a blonde popped out and waved her hat around.

"Hello New York! Hannah Montana is here!" she yelled.

Annabeth and Percy ran from the pavillion to the cabin and stopped to stare up at her in amazement. What the Fuzzy Bunnies (Thank you to one of my reviewers for coining this.) was Hannah Montana doing in Camp Half-Blood calling it New York? Then Thalia emmerged from the helicopter too, dragging Nico behind her, kidnapper status. She pulled out a celestial bronze dagger and stabbed Hannah is the side, Hannah screamed and burst into dust.

"I always knew she was a monster." Annabeth whispered to Percy as Thalia leapt off the roof with Nico in tow and waved to the helicopter as it flew away.

"What was up with that?" Annabeth said as Thaila came within suitable conversation distance.

"That was my ride." she replied.

"I don't even want to know..." Percy stated.

"Hey where's Chad?" Thalia said, off topic.

"In my cabin playing with tape." Percy sighed, "He's been doing that same thing for 3 days....!!!"

"Interesting..." Thalia said, not really caring as she headed to the Poseidon cabin and Percy and Annabeth followed. She threw the door open and marched inside grabbing Chad and his tape covered top hat letting the tape pieces that infested the entire room stick to her. Nico gulped audibly knowing what was coming as Chad curled up into a hard ball and Thalia raised him over her head bringing him down on his head. Hard.

Nico was knocked unconscious and Chad resumed playing with tape and drinking tea.

"Where did you get that tea?" Percy asked him because he knew he for sure did not own any tea or tea cups for that matter. Chad just shrugged.

"What did Nico do to make you so mad?" Annabeth asked Thaila.

"He was breathing on me." Thalia sniffed distainfully as she set the Twilight book series down next to Nico's head.

All of a sudden Jacob Black and Edward Cullen apeared out of no where outside in the middle of all the cabins. Jacob pulled a flame thrower out of his pants and fired it at Edward who used Bella (Where the heck had she come from?) as a meat shield.

Nico woke up next to the Twilight books and screamed.

"I LOVE TWILIGHT!!!!!!!" He exclaimed. Then he took notice of the 2 men and crispy woman outside and ran toward Edward.

"OMIGODS IT'S YOU!!!!!!!!" he yelled as he jumped up and down on Edwards arm.

"Dear god, not another gay fanboy...." Edward groaned.

"The world is officially ending." Annabeth sighed. Thalia and Percy looked at eachother and ran off screaming.

"THE WORLD IS ENDING!!!!!!!!!!!!" They said. As they ran through the camp more people heard and believed them causing a mass panic. Annabeth sighed and everyone started shreiking more as they realized they couldn't see anymore. They were all blind.

"Make yourself look big!" one camper suggested.

"NO! Stop drop and roll!" said another.

"Get in a doorway!" one said.

"Grab your closest copy of Twilight and start jerking!" Nico suggested. They all did. Jacob, Edward and the miraculously healed Bella were the only ones that could see and decided that things were just TOO wierd now so they ran away. Everyone was still jerking with their Twilight books until they stopped and realized that they weren't actually blind. They had forgotten to take off their blind folds after Zeus' birthday pinata game.


	21. Damn Straight Chad Isn't

**Hello everyone, I'm sorry to have left you all for so long with out a chapter. Here's one but I wanted to cover some things with you all... PS... I need a date for Winter Formal.... Oh wait! I really shouldn't sell myself on the internet! But hey, if we were to go together would you believe me if I said it would be a dull night with me? Didn't think so... Hey guess what?! It's raining! So anyway......:**

**1) I will never ever put any of my readers in my story.**

**2) Thank you all for being such lovely readers but you but review more often or else I will stop writing.**

**3) Thank you to who ever coined, "What the fuzzy bunnies?!" I use it all the times.**

**4) Once and for all everyone I am not on anything illegal!**

**5) I have a Chad pin.**

**6) Leave me your ideas.**

War had been raging for days. Jello versus pudding and the leader was still unclear. Team Jell-O and Team Pudding were at eachothers throats at camp trying to decide once and for all who was better. The captain of the pudding team? Percy. Captain of the Jell-O team? Annabeth. That's right everyone, a war to end all wars. Cannon balls of the sugary treats were being fired all over camp and not even the smaller demi-gods were safe. They too would be pelted with Jell-O and/or pudding while just strolling around camp minding their own buisness.

"YOU STINK!" Percy yelled at Annabeth from behind his barricade with his face painted army style and a bandana around his forehead.

"YOU'RE STINKIER!" Annabeth yelled also clad in a similar outfit of war of the dessert variety. The entire camp was divided on this subject. Chiron rode up soon and stood between the 2 sides glancing around in a way that made everyone stop what they were doing and pay attention.

"Have none of you realized that the brand name, Jell-O makes pudding? Therefore, Jell-O is Pudding and Pudding is Jell-O." he said diplomatically.

"No one cares who makes what. This is war we don't need a reason for anything! If we wanted to go over and TAKE their stupid Jell-O we damn well could! Well actually we just did." Percy said. Annabeth yelled in frustration, "What are you even gonna do with all our Jell-O?!"

"Don't know but we have it!" Percy laughed. Annabeth stamped her foot and got up to search for more Jell-O only to be shot in the butt by Percy.

"Percy! That wasn't very sportsman-like!" she yelled stomping over to his hunched form, ignoring the barricade.

"Who is this Percy?! I am not Percy! Percy is no longer here! I AM THE SNUGGIE-LORD!!!!" He yelled, laughing evily and tackled her. They landed in a puddle of mixed Jell-O and pudding. Annabeth yelped and started laughing. Percy was still on top of her.

"I suppose it doesn't matter which we think is better. We're still boyfriend and girlfriend, right?" Percy laughed.

"Oh, I suppose..." Annabeth said jokingly. Percy kissed her.

"NO!! I'M MELTING!!!" Chad yelled out of no where and started sinking to his knees dramatically, "No, I'm just kidding. You guys have fun, I'm going to find Zac." He said as he turned to all the beans surounding his feet. They looked positively ravenous due to their lack of cupcakes and were fightening for such adorable little things.

"Let's go! I heard Zac forgot his rape whistle at home today!"

**Sorry! I started writing and couldn't resist the fluffy Percabeth moment! OH! I JUST LOVED THAT! That, my friends, was PJO Percabeth romance at it's best without any PG-13 rated kissing descrpitions! *squeals* Oh I just loved that! Yay Snuggie-Lord! (Didn't I tell you those things would take over the world? Who called it? That's right! Me!)**


	22. I'm Done

**Okay, well I got 6 reviews on chapter 24 and ONE, count em, ONE review on chapter 25. I've had it. Less and less reviews every every chapter. I'm done. I warned you all. So, I will be deleting all A/N chapters and revising all story chapters to fix all errors on them. If you want me to continue. I suggest you review. And I mean REVIEW. 'Haha' is NOT a review! Nor is 'Funny' or 'That's funny'. Until I get more reviews per chapter this story is halted. I would like to apologize to my regular reviewers:**

Arcasylem Alexia

XxSquigglySpoochxX

Bobbythebear

MusicAndWriting

Jake_the_Drake

huskychao

Air_meepit

StarDust2345

Stupid_little_emo_hippie_girls

Science_Meets_Fiction

veryannoyed

Ah_Young_Half_Blood_Love

Avalonfreak

if_i_were_a_demigod

It_was_all_a_PUZZLE

Magical_Flying_Pie

The_Foreseer_of_Avalon

If your name was not on the list it's probably because you don't review every chapter and if you do then I'm very sorry I missed you.

A sincere F you to:

theghostqueen

Zoe_Nightshade

Caramel_Kryptonite

PowerofWords12

p4d

Now, Like I said:

There will be chapter deletions (Only ANs)

Chapter editing (all chapters)

No more chapters until I get more reviews that are at least intelligent.

More reviews= More chapters.

If ONE person sent me sugar or candy that would also= Instant chapter updates.

Now, When you review this chapter, or IF because I'm so pissed I want you to add you age, sex, and location because I'm extremely curious as to who used to read my story.

-Miranda


	23. Facebook Group!

**Alrighty everyone. I have created a group on Facebook called, "I Love 'PJO on Crack'"! Join it! Do it! I will post my ideas for chapters and inspirations for the day. (sugar) I would love for you people who came up with 'Chad Day' (I love you all for that!) to upload some photos of that. You can post questions and ideas and all that stuff! Pester me about updates as often as you like! I'll more than likely listen to you!**

**Also, someone emailed me about wanting T-shirts made of quotes from my story. I'll only do it if you all are interested! So if you could please submit your favorite quotes and stuff and I'll see what I can do for you crazy people! (They said that the Harry Potter Puppet Pals do this and that I should too.) **

**OMG! A PJO TRAILER JUST CAME ON THE TV!!!!!! I FLIPPED OUT!!!!!!!!!**

**Anyway, let's review:**

**Facebook group (JOIN IT!)**

**Pictures (Upload it!)**

**Pestering (Do it!)**

**T-Shirts (Let me know about it!)**

**Very nice now carry on and review and join!**


	24. Movie stuff

**Okay, I JUST got back from the movie and it was AWESOME! (But only if you go with low expectations...) At the part where they're in the Lotus Casino they were actinng like they were on crack and I FREAKED OUT! I wore my Camp Half-Blood shirt to the movie and had my purple armadillo pin stuck to it! So fun! Okay so the movie inspired this chapter. This chapter will also point out all the things wrong with the movie. Sorry, I have to bitch about it to SOMEONE!**

Okay, so this is what's going on, the movie is being filmed at camp Half-Blood and all the characters are 12 like they were in the book and the actors are exactly how they were in the movie too. (Meaning old and looking unlike their characters.)

"Hey, who are THOSE guys over there?" Percy asked Annabeth while in archery practice. There were camera crews and people wearing their camp armor.

"They're filming a movie about us." Annabeth said as she shot an arrow and hit the bullseye perfectly.

"What? Why?" Percy asked as he shot an arrow and missed the target completely. He got frustrated and grabbed his water bottle and started firing the water inside of it at the target hitting it perfectly with his water daggers.

"We're a popular tween book and THAT is cheating." she said pointing at Percy's soaking wet target. Percy shrugged.

"I'm not a son of Apollo."

"You're right, maybe if you were you wouldn't be such a Seaweed Brain." Annabeth said, "Anyway, they'll be filming here. See that guy over there?"

"Who? The good-looking one?" Percy asked staring at the new commers.

"Yeah, that's supposed to be you." she said.

"What?! But he's.....OLD!!!" Percy said.

"Yeah, I know. You look _nothing_ like him." Annabeth snickered.

"Hey! That wasn't very nice!" Percy exclaimed as he shot water from his water bottle at her. "Stupid Wise Girl." he grumbled.

"That's an oxymoron..."Annabeth laughed.

"I'm a _what_ moron?!" Percy said. Annabeth just rolled her eyes and started stripping off her equipment and Percy followed her lead.

"So why don't they just use _us_?" Percy asked as he followed her to meet the older people and Grover joined them.

"Because we're fictional." Annabeth said matter-of-factly.

"Oh yeah..." Percy said.

"So you guys talking about the movie people?" Grover cut in. They all stopped in front of the movie cameras, apparently everyone was on break.

"Nope we're talking _to_ them." Annabeth said as they aproached the group.

"Hi!" Percy said.

"Ummm... Hello?" Logan Lerman replied.

"You're old!" Percy told him, "Your eyes aren't green. None of you are wearing Camp shirts. Where's Clarisse? Who's that?" Percy said and pointed to the brunnette girl next to him.

"I'm playing Annabeth." she smiled.

"But your a brunnette! Your eyes are _blue!_" Annabeth said, horrified.

"Yeah, well I wasn't about to dye my hair or wear contacts." she said appologetically.

"Don't you have a problem with your guy, Grover?" Percy said.

"Dude, I'm just happy that I didn't get cut from the movie!" he said fist bumping the black dude.

"But yours is the most off of all of them!" Annabeth complained. Grover shrugged,"You haven't read the script yet have you?"

Annabeth and Percy quickly read over one of the scripts and readied their Jell-O and Pudding cannons. They high-fived and started shooting the producers and actors. It was a good day..........

**Horrible chapter, I know. I wasn't really that inspired. During this next week Percy and the gang search for a magic bean! I really did like the movie I just felt that this was necessary. ;) Review!!!!!!**


	25. Bessie!

**Ummm... Hello. I am not dead. The story is not over.... sorry I haven't updated in FOREVER. I've been so busy with synchronized swimming. I've flown to Seattle and Texas and traveled everywhere and the season's not even half way through! Next I'll be in New York and then back to Texas. We've had practice almost everyday leaving me no time to write. I will apologize with another taste of my book and a new chapter of PJOOC!!! Enjoy!!!**

Ok, so maybe even daughters of Athena could do stupid things from time to time... **(Actually happened to me. All of this actually happened. I am Annabeth and Emma is Percy but the cow tipping rant is mine! Mine I tell you!) **So as it turns out it was Annabeth's own stupidity that got her into this mess. The younger Athenians had decided to put in a dog door at the back of the cabin so that when they frogot their keys they could just climb in through the dog door. Well, today was the one day that Annabeth had fogotten her keys so she figured that she'd just slip in throught the dog door like the little ones.

Annabeth had had some trouble with getting her shoulders in but after much contorting she was sure that the worst was over. She had her head and shoulders in the dog door now, to pull all the way through. She was caught. Her boobs were too large to fit through! But she was determined damnit! She wiggled and wiggled and got one boob in, painfully. And after much more painful wiggling she got the other one in! Yes! That was the widest part of her body! Surely it was home free now! This was easy! Her chest hurt like no other but that would pass. She was home free!

Annabeth's waist was skinny so she moved through a lot more with ease. Then her hips got caught. CRAP! She realized that her hips were just as wide as her chest. No problem, she had gotten her chest through, hips were no big deal. After 10 minutes of pulling she realized that hips were no where near as malliable as chests and that she was quite frankly, screwed.

No big deal! I'll just go backward! she thought. But as it turned out boobs are not shaped for going BACKWARDS through dog doors. Only forwards. Her abdomen ached with the effort to get out so she just laid there and tried thinking of a plan to get out. After 5 minutes nothing had come to her. She sighed and laid her head on the floor of the inside of the cabin. So close but yet so far...........

Someone opened the front door of the cabin.

"Annabeth?! You left your keys in the arena!" It was Percy. Oh Gods......

"Annabeth? Oh my Gods! What did you do?!" He cried hysterically. After a long and tearful laughing fit on Percy's end the room fell quiet.

"I think Chiron will have to come cut you out of the dog door." Percy said.

"Oh man....." Annabeth sighed.

*30 minutes later*

"You know what? I don't think I'd ever go cow tipping." Percy said thoughfully.

"Really? Why is that?" Annabeth said feining interest from her dog door.

"Because I'd feel too bad. What if the cow couldn't get back up again? I imagine all the cows going back to the farm except for Bessie. He would be stuck laying there."

"He?"

"Yeah, his name is Bessie even though he's a boy. It makes it sadder. But anyway, all the cows would go in except for Bessie the boy cow becuase he was tipped and he couldn't get back up. Then 3 months go by and the farmer finally realizes that Bessie is missing and goes searching for him all the while feeling bad for naming the poor boy cow Bessie. And when he finds Bessie Bessie is malnourished and underwaight with a ring of eaten grass around him. The farmer goes to pick him up and Bessie just falls back down because he's too weak! So they make Bessie into hamburgers! And it would be all my fault because I tipped Bessie the boy cow!" Percy said.

"Wow... And you JUST thought of this?" Annabeth said.

"Yeah." Percy said inoccently.

"Why would that ring of eaten grass even occur to you?" Annabeth asked. Percy shrugged.

"Well I'm going to try to get out of this thing backward no matter how bad it hurts." She said.

"Your bruised boobs I suppose. Chiron could just come and cut you out." Percy suggested.

"Nope." Annabeth pressed with all her strength. Boobs out!!! Shoulders!!! She was free!!!

"OWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" she yelled. Percy cracked up again.

"Shut up Seaweed Brain. I am going to go cry in a corner." Annabeth said as she walked into her cabin and shut the door behind herself.

"You have fun with that Owl Pellet Head." Percy chuckled. Chad ran up and hugged Percy's leg, "PLEASE WILL YOU GO COW TIPPING WITH ME?!?!?!"

"Bessie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Percy cried and ran to his cabin.

**And now for my book snipet.**

"Don't freak out. Just stay quiet. I'm not going to hurt you." Porthos whipped me around and put his hands on my throat so I was facing where my guardian's voices had come from. My heart rate sky rocketed. What was he going to do?!

"You guys were gone for a long time. Everything alright?" Mr. Elric said as he apeared at the other end of the sea cave cliff. Porthos's iron strong aarms were wrapped securely around my throat. I clawed at his hands for freedom. It was ture, he wasn't hurting me but that didn't make me any less scared. Mrs. Elric appeared at Mr. Elric's side. Porthos switched his grip on my neck pulling me closer to him and his forearm around my neck. He pulled us backward until we were right on the edge of the cliff.

"NO!!!" Mrs. Elric shreiked, "Come back! Please!"

Porthos didn't listen. "I'm sorry." he said.

He backed up further and leaned backward. We plummetted through the air and hit the icy swirling water below. We never came back up.


	26. It's an AN

**I am so terribly, horribly sorry for not updating in a while. I know you all have probably forgotten about my story now and I deeply apologize. Believe it or not synchronized swimming is taking up more of my life all the time. I know, doesn't seem possible, right? Anyway, I have been flying all over the place lately.**

**West Zones- Seattle, WA. (National Level... I'm pretty sure. Can't remember exactly.)**

**Jr. Nationals- Austin, TX. (National Meet. As high as you can compete without being in the Olympics)**

**Upcoming meets**

**Age Group Nationals- Buffalo, NY. (National Level) (My Solo made it!)**

**Junior Opens- Irving, TX. (International Level)**

**So as you can see I've been terribly busy. It's been a hard year this year. Lost team mates who are like my sisters. Had a bad boyfriend who still managed to break my heart. Lost my heart to a beautiful city called Seattle and had my father got laid off his job all since my last update.**

**So I know you don't really care about crap like that but those are my excuses. Anyway, going to update soon and frequently. It's almost summer so I'll theoretically have more time. Though I'll be planning my Sweet 16. So leave some ideas in reviews if you feel compelled to do so. I need them. Chad says 'Hi' he misses you all but he's keeping himself entertained with copious amounts of yaoi. Makes me gag. I love and support gay people but I don't need every detail of the latest doujinshi he read. Though I suppose it's better than him singing 'Girlfriend' by Avril Lavigne 24/7. He has also fallen in love with Caramelldansen again. Good thing I like it too.**

**So anyway here is your to do list:**

**Review**

**Give ideas**

**Remind Miranda that someone loves her... (Oh crap... No more advertising myself on the internet!)**

**Leave some new song suggestions for Chad in that review.**

**Convince Miranda to come back to this fandom from her Fullmetal Alchemist obsession for a little while.**

**Look up Caramelldansen on YouTube and dance it for yourself.**

**Anyway! You are all now free to go! Review and get an update in return!**

**-I am Miranda of the Tempest**

**(Seriously, I am.)**


	27. Lessons in Chadism

**Ok, so here is another apology A/N... I've been so busy with Nationals next week that I haven't had time to write... I will VERY soon but for now I only have ideas... SORRY!**

**So, this chapter is about Chad. I will add fun facts about him in a minute so you can get to know him better but this is mainly about how someone has made a Facebook account for him. I swear to the gods that it isn't me and that I have no idea who it is. It's not any of my friends either. We are extremely confused by this mysterious fan-person. I want it to be known that that is NOT Chad and anything this person does with his Facebook account is not controlled by me in anyway. With that said, on to the fun facts.**

**1) Chad is english**

**2) He has only 3 top hats.**

**3) He dyes himself purple on a weekly basis.**

**4) He uses the waffle iron to intensify the color.**

**5) He is neutral in the pudding vs. Jell-O war but is still partial to pudding. (slightly)**

**6) He has gotten over Percy and moved on to focus solely on Zac Efron.**

**7) He turned 16 on Monday. (Because it was my 16th birthday on Monday and he IS me... kinda...)**

**8) He is not actually from England.**

**9) He is an avid reader of Seventeen magazine.**

**10) His favorite singers are Taylor Swift and Jesse McCartney (who he'd also like to rape)**

**11) He is part of a gay club.**

**12) Sushi night is on Wednesday and he is always in charge of bringing the eel.**

**13) There is only one other member in Chad's gay club, and that's Justin Beiber.**

**14) Chad was previously obsessed with the songs Numa Numa and Caramelldansen, he is now a fan of 'King of Anything' by Sara Barielles. (Because I deemed it AMAZING and allow him to sing it 24/7)**

**15) Chad's favorite food is pork buns.**

**16) Chad was previously a jigalow. (JK, he was only a stripper.)**

**17) He loves the beach, long walks, and poking dead things with a stick.**

**18) He is jealous of my new boyfriend. (Who asked me to be his girlfriend tonight. :))**

**19) He won't even tap Justin Beiber.**

**20) Chad hopes to one day make swiss cheese that forms stars instead of circles. **

**(I just got the mystery Chad lover to sign the Facebook page over to me!)**


	28. AN

**So, I woke up 10 minutes ago and started getting ready to leave for Nationals. My plane leaves at 5 am to Buffalo, New York. Hooray! So when all of you review it makes my day. But this review i woke up to before the biggest meet of my life made me realize that there is so much scum out there that it's amazing I don't step in shit like this person all the time.**

nn  
2010-06-27 . chapter 1

i saw your avatar. is that you? i hope not 'cause you're so fat i could hardly see the poster. i cant imagine how you can swim without sinking the moment you hit the water. id be embarrassed and ashamed if i were a four eyed whale like you.

lay off the fast food. oh. and get some talent and stop whoring for reviews.

not cool

**Do you also like to mircowave puppies? For this review it seems like your favorite pastime. Or do you like going to the park and pushing small kids into sandboxes. You strike me as that kind of person.**

**120 pounds is fat? I'd hate to see what you look like! My advice is that if you're sad enough to write reviews like this then maybe you should buy a happy meal. And you're obviously too skinny so let's super size the deal. :)**

**I am not and will never be embaressed or ashamed of myself.**

**Four eyed? Really? What are we? In kindergardten?**

**I don't eat fast food because that's poison for my body which is a machine than I need to keep in top shape. I'm sorry you don't have any friends and that you're such a coward you didn't have the balls to review un-anonymously.**

**I am not hurt by your review. I just feel sorry for you.**


	29. IcyHot and Peanut Butter

**So sorry it's taken so long to update. I was waiting for funny chiz to go down at Nationals... and it did... *evil smile* So yeah, this really did happen. :) Annabeth is my old duet partner and I'm Percy. The other Athena demi-gods will be the rest of my team.**

It had been a long hard day of training and camp activities for Annabeth and she was ready to go to bed. But before she could do that she needed to put IcyHot on her aching knees. She rubbed it on and turned out the lights snuggling down to go to sleep.

Five minutes later Percy woke up to the sound of screaming, he fell out of his bunk and hit the ground with a 'thud'. Percy jumped up and sleepily uncapped RipTide standing ready to fight. The screaming continued for another few seconds before Percy fully woke up and identified the scream as Annabeth's. He ran out of his cabin at top speed and into the Athena cabin. (Without being invited... oops!)

Annabeth was lying on her bed with the Athena girls bustling around her in a panic and Chad holding her hand. Annabeth kept screaming and to Percy's horror she was lying in a birthing position. He didn't know what to make of the scene before him until he burst out laughing hysterically. Annabeth was crying and screaming and her knees were a puffy and angry shade of red but the whole thing was so ridiculous.

"Quick! Get some peanut butter!" one demigod girl yelled.

"NO! It's Olive oil! You're supposed to put olive oil on burns!" Another girl shouted. But it was too late, half the cabin had torn out of the room going in search of peanut butter. Not 2 minutes later they all returned with jars of peanut butter and started spreading it ALL OVER Annabeth's knees as she continued crying on the bed.

"Shouldn't you just get Chiron?" Percy suggested. According to the looks on everyone's faces they hadn't thought of that. Oops... 10 minutes went by and Chiron trotted in.

"Annabeth go soak your knees in ice water, and the rest of you, why is it that whenever you can't find me you substitute me with peanut butter? Seriously? Peanut butter is NOT the cure for...well, ANYTHING!" Chiron said. No one had a response. Chiron turned to leave grumbling, "Would you like your Activities Director crunchy or SMOOTH?" **(It's true, for some reason my team runs to get the peanut butter before the coach or chaperone in case of ANY emergency. I haven't a clue why.)**

"Are you okay Annabeth?" Percy asked worriedly.

"I am now." She replied as she dried ice water, peanut butter, IcyHot, and tears from herself.

"Alright then." Percy said.

Chad said as he hopped down from Annabeth's bed, "Well if we're done spreading condiments on eachother, I am going to bed."


	30. Baby

**It's Rachel singing to Percy.**

Ohh wooaah Ohh wooaah Ohh wooaah  
You know you love me, I know you care  
Just shout whenever, And I'll be there  
You are my love, You are my heart  
And we will never ever-ever be apart

Are we an item. Man quit playing  
"We're just friends"  
What are you sayin?  
said theres another and looked right in my eyes  
My first love broke my heart for the first time,

And I was like  
Percy, Percy, Percy ooh  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy noo  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy ooh  
Thought you'd always be mine, mine

Percy, Percy, Percy oohh  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy noo  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy ohh  
Thought you'd always be mine, mine

For you, i would have done what ever  
And I just cant believe we ain't together  
And I wanna play it cool, But I'm losing you  
I'll foretell anything, ill tell you anything  
And I'm the new Oracle, Percy love me  
and just tell me when you need me to help cheat

I'm going down, down, down, down  
And I just can't believe, my first love won't be around

And I'm like,  
Percy, Percy, Percy oooh  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy noo  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy ooh  
Thought you'd always be mine, mine

Percy, Percy, Percy oooh  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy noo  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy ooh  
Thought you'd always be mine, mine

Percy, Percy, Percy ohh  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy noo  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy ohh  
Thought you'd always be mine, mine

Percy, Percy, Percy ooh  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy noo  
Like Percy, Percy, Percy oooh  
Thought you'd always be mine, mine

(Now I'm all gone)  
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah  
Yeah Yeah Yeah  
(Now I'm all gone)  
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah  
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

(Now I'm all gone)  
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah  
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah  
Now I'm all gone, gone, gone, ooh  
I'm gone

**Hooray! She's gone! Anyway, people have been asking why i pick on Nico. I dont hate Nico, I love him, but he is SO easy to pick on!**


	31. Girlfriend

Hey, hey, you, you, I don't like your girlfriend  
No way, no way, I think you need a new one  
Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your boyfriend

Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me  
No way, no way, you know it's not a secret  
Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your boyfriend

You're so fine, I want you mine, you're so delicious  
I think about you all the time, you're so addictive  
Don't you know what I can do to make you feel alright?  
Alright, alright, alright

Don't pretend, I think you know I'm promiscuous  
And so yeah, I'm a hey, hey armadillo

I can tell you like me too and you know I'm right  
I'm right, I'm right, I'm right

She's like so whatever  
You could do so much better  
I think we should get together now  
And that's what everybody's talking about

Hey, hey, you, you, I don't like your girlfriend  
No way, no way, I think you need a new one  
Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your boyfriend

Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me  
No way, no way, you know it's not a secret  
Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your boyfriend

I can see the way, I see the way you look at me  
And even when you look away I know you think of me  
I know you talk about me all the time again and again  
And again and again and again

So come over here and tell me what I wanna hear  
Better yet, make your girlfriend disappear  
I don't wanna hear you say her name ever again  
And again and again and again

Cause she's like so whatever  
And you could do so much better  
I think we should get together now  
And that's what everybody's talking about

Hey, hey, you, you, I don't like your girlfriend  
No way, no way, I think you need a new one  
Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your boyriend

Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me  
No way, no way, you know it's not a secret  
Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your boyfriend

Oh, in a second you'll be wrapped around my finger  
Woo, 'cause I can, 'cause I can do it better  
There's no other, so when's it gonna sink in?  
Hey, she's so stupid, just what were you thinking?

In a second you'll be wrapped around my finger  
'Cause I can, 'cause I can do it better  
There's no other, so when's it gonna sink in?  
She's so stupid, just what were you thinking?

Hey, hey, you, you, I don't like your girlfriend  
No way, no way, I think you need a new one  
Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your boyfriend  
No way, no way

Hey, hey, I know that you like me  
No way, no way, you know it's not a secret  
Hey, hey, I want to be your boyfriend  
No way, no way, no way, no way

**You all are welcome to guess who is singing this song and to who. You may even be right. :)**


	32. Just Friends

**So, I know I have been updating a lot. I have nothing to do today and Emma is over and this is keeping us occupied. This is Percy singing to Annabeth. this is a JoBro song.**

There she goes again, the girl I'm in love with  
It's cool, we're just friends, we walk the grounds at camp.  
We know it's casual, it's cool, we're just...

I don't want to lead you on  
No, but the truth is I've grown fond, yeah

Everyone knows it's meant to be  
Falling in love, just you and me  
Till the end of time, till I'm on her mind, it'll happen

I've been making lots of plans  
Like a picket fence and a rose garden  
I just keep on dreaming

But it's cool 'cause we're just friends

Small talk at camp, just one word sentences  
It's cool, we're just friends  
If I had my way, we'd talk and talk all day, yeah

Everyone knows it's meant to be  
Falling in love, just you and me  
Till the end of time, till I'm on her mind, it'll happen

I've been making lots of plans  
Like a picket fence and a rose garden  
I just keep on dreaming

But it's cool 'cause we're just friends

Thinking about how, we're gonna say our vows  
It's cool we're just friends, she walks down the aisle  
Seeing my face smile 'cause now, we're more than friends

Everyone knows it's meant to be  
Falling in love, just you and me  
Till the end of time, till I'm on your mind, it'll happen, oh

We've been making lots of plans  
Like a picket fence and a rose garden  
I just keep on dreaming  
Just keep on thinking about when we used to be just friends

(La, la, la, la)  
(La, la, la, la)  
(La, la, la, la, la)  
When we used to be, when we used to be

(La, la, la, la)  
(La, la, la, la)  
Just friends  
(La, la, la, la, la)  
When we used to be just friends

**So, Idk if we'll post MORE chapters today but we hope you enjoyed the many song parodys. :) Review and get an update with a story not a song. :)**


	33. Yay! Sickness!

**Ok, so I'm sitting at home with strep throat and I realize, 'I could be updating my stories!' So I am. Also, no one got the answer right on the 'Guess who's singing to who' thing. It was Chad to Zac Efron! You silly people. So this chapter is just going to be a series of 1 question interviews with the cast. All being questioned by yours truly. :)**

**So, Annabeth, if you could have one thing in the world what would it be?**

"Hmmm... Did you know there's a species of goats that has this defense mechanism that whenever they're think they're in any sort of trouble they'll faint? Well I want a field full of them so that I can run through the field every morning screaming and flapping my arms and watch them fall as I pass. That would be awesome.

**Percy, if you could be president for a day, what would you do?**

I think I'd paint the continent in posters telling people that if the world doesn't end, like I know it won't, then there will be a crap load of babies born the following September and to be prepared.

**Grover, you and Juniper can go anywhere for the day, even a land of your own creation, where would that be?**

Enchiladaland... YUM! As long as Juniper doesn't touch my enchiladas. OW! I mean you can have ALL my enchiladas if you'd like Dear!

**Clarrisse, do you know what we're having for lunch?**

Perhaps some fava beans?

**Nico, why do I love picking on you?**

Cuz I'm an easy and emo-y target?

**Give the boy a prize.**

**Okay Chad, your turn- NO! WAIT CHAD! DON'T LICK THAT!**

...

**Luke, you have pissed me off, what are your options?**

Die or die...?

**We need another prize over here!**

**Chiron, let's say you have 1 wish and you can wish for anything, what is your wish?**

A remotely nice father who enjoys wheel chair basketball as much as I do.

**Mr. D I have a question for you, if you were to-OW! Okay...**

**...**

**Zeus, how do you feel about your rubber ducky's anti-social behavior after that Backstreet Boy shower concert?**

No comment.


	34. Just a Note

**Ummmm... Hello. So I just re-read my author's notes and I have apologized like every flipping chapter! And sadly, this one won't be any different. But I just don't have anymore ideas. I bought the very first copy of The Lost Hero to be sold in my city and dove headfirst into it. It's amazing so far! But anyway I have excuses and please review with ideas. I'll make a chapter entirely dedicated to them. I swear.**

**Excuses:**

**I am a Junior now and am taking AP Lang & Comp which is killer.**

**I just quit my old synchro team and switched to the enemy team. (DRAMA!) which is conveniently located 2 hours away. So i drive 2 hours there, practice for 3 hours, and then drive 2 hours back home. So naturally I have oodles of free time.**

**I am obsessed with Deadpool. (If you dont know who that is then look it up. You wont regret it.)**

**And Glee and The Lost Hero demand all my attention when I'm not busy.**

**Chad has a Facebook. He's Chad-The Purple Armadillo. He's the only one. Shocker. Until Tuesday!**


	35. The Creeper Game

**Ok, So I know you thought I'd never update again but here's an honest to God chapter! No excuses! No apologies! No bullcrap! Whoo hoo! So anyway, I've considered becoming a YouTuber and putting all this stuff in video form or just plain becoming a vlogger. What do you think? Don't forget to review! Oh, and everything in this chapter actually happened to me! Imagine me as Percy and replace all the PJO stuff with mythological stuff and you'll see.**

"Annabeth! Would you call the Grey Sister's cab for me? Please?" Percy said.

"Uh-sure." Annabeth replied and within moments the cabs was right in front of them. Percy pulled Annabeth inside with him. The "buckle-up' recording played and the sisters tore off.

"Watch this," Percy laughed. As cars pulled near their cab he starred at them intently as he said, "FEEL MY GAZE, FEEL IT! NOW GET PARANOID... NOW LOOK IN MY DIRECTION... NOW, CREEPY SMILE." The man in the car beside the taxi had indeed seemigly 'felt his gaze' and gotten paranoid enough to look in his direction. That's when Percy engaged his creepiest smile he was capable of. He did this several times**. (No joke, I do this on my uber long car rides to Riverside everyday and the following reactions have all happened. It's called the Creeper Game and it really works. This is what happens when you lock me in small spaces for prolonged amounts of time.)**

One woman looked around her empty car to make sure Percy was, in fact, smiling creepily at her. A few people changed lanes to get away from the taxi. One guy winked flirtily at him. One shirtless guy driving a hippie van nodded approvingly. One boy licked the window as a response. One woman flipped him off. And one elderly man smiled creepily back as well. It was a satifying game because you got to project awkwardness into someone else's car and odds were you'd never see them again! You could make them feel uncomfortable and then drive away and go on with your life. **(Though I AM afraid that I'll cause an accident one day... But until that day comes, the Creeper Game will keep being played by me!)**

Annabeth picked it up and started playing the game from her side of the car as well and soon both were rolling in their seats laughing so hard they cried. When they got out Chad popped out of Percy's backpack and shouted with a bannana in his hand, "BANANA'S INCREASE AWKWARDNESS!"


	36. Mean?

**It's been so hard to get into the Christmas spirit lately! Finals! Grrr! Anyway, another Taylor Swift song fic from Rachel to Annabeth just for you guys.**

You, with your words like knives, and swords and weapons that you use  
against me, (Literally!)  
You, have knocked me off my feet again, got me feeling like a mortal,  
You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard calling me out when I'm  
wounded,  
You, picking on the weaker girl.

Well you can take me down with just one single blow, But you don't  
know what you don't know.

Someday, I'll be living in with Percy,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Someday, I'll be powerful enough so that you can't hit me,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Why you gotta be so mean?

You, with your stealing guys and your kick ass-ness and your  
halfblood ways,  
You, have pointed out my flaws again, as if I don't already see them,  
I walk with my head up trying to block you out 'cause I'll never impress  
him,  
I just wanna feel okay again.

I'll bet you got pushed around, somebody made you tough,  
But this thing ends right now 'cause you can't scare me away.  
But you don't know what you don't know.

Someday, I'll be living with Percy,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Someday, I'll be powerful enough so that you can't hit me,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Why you gotta be so mean?

And I can see you years from now in a full on war over a prophecy,  
With those same big grey eyes but nobody's helping,  
Pinned down and needing back up but no ones there,  
Wounded and stumbling on knowing you can't win,  
Cuz all you are is mean.  
All you are is mean, and a whore, and pathetic, and gonna be alone in life and mean.  
And mean, and mean, and mean.

But someday, I'll be living with Percy,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Yeah, yeah.  
Someday, I'll be powerful enough so you can't hit me,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Why you gotta be so mean?

Someday, I'll be living with Percy,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Someday, I'll be powerful enough so you can't hit me,  
And all you're ever gonna be is mean.  
Why you gotta be so mean?

Annabeth turned to Percy, "You hear something?"

Chad popped out randomly, "I heard a musical threat! Somebody's gonna get effed up!"


	37. Letters to Texas

**Ok, so I know it's been a while and I didn't intend on continuing this because I am 17 (and obviously very mature now, jk! ;)) Any who, it's pretty late and Emma and I are having a sleepover before i have surgery tomorrow and move to Morgan Hill (400 miles away from my current place of residence.) and we're sort of high on sugar so we figured, 'what better time to write more PJO On Crack?' So here we go... (and as per usual all of this stuff actually happened to me and yes, it is horribly sad. I'm Percy and Annabeth is Emma again.) It's gonna be shit by the way. Like grammar should be good but descriptions won't be super awesome.**

So Percy was running low on gold drakmas and he wanted to send a letter with money in it to buy some message bracelets with Glee stuff on them **(That's where I've been, the Glee fandom. I REGRET NOTHING.)**, but he realized that he had no idea what to put on a letter in order to send one. He knew it went in an envelope and that envelope went into a mailbox but he had NO CLUE what went on the outside in order to get the letter to Texas. He had no idea what to do, so he naturally texted Annabeth.

From: Percy

I am about to sound really REALLY dumb... How much stamp money does it take to send an envelope to Texas?

From: Annabeth

It's usually just one stamp. Depends on the envelope size and weight.

From: Percy

Just a regular envelope with one piece of paper inside and 2 bills.

From: Annabeth

One stamp. It's like 44 cents or something like that.

From: Percy

Ooohhhh! And I have one! Sweet!

From: Annabeth

Nice lol

From: Percy

Imma send a letter to Texas to talk to I don't know how the mail system works! So I put this thing called a 'letter' in 'the mailbox' and some man will take it away to Texas tomorrow? He knows where the bracelets are?

From: Annabeth

Yes, lol. Well, not him...

From: Percy

Ohmigod! Not him? Who does he give my money too?

From: Annabeth

It goes on a plane or truck to the zip code... then another man takes it to the people with the bracelets lol.

From: Percy

How do they KNOW where the bracelet lady lives? It's an organization of witches! Witchcraft! I can't even find my damn stamps... but-but... the bracelets! TT^TT What corner does the stamp go in?

From: Annabeth

Top right

From: Percy

Awesome.

Percy did as he was told and then realized he had no idea what went on the outside and the icon on his phone was not an accurate diagram so he googled images of the front of letters and stuck the finished product in the mail. Two weeks later he got his bracelets in the mail. But Chad had been the UPS guy. When Percy asked why Chad was working for UPS Chad said,

"It pays the bills on my hovercraft."


End file.
